Be a Warrior Queen

Valentine's Day Random Acts of Kindness

2012-02-10T11:00:00.000-08:00

Do something great on Valentine's Day :)

Subscribe to the channel <3

BIG day in Politics

2012-02-07T12:59:00.000-08:00

Hello,

This will be brief today because I have a lot of homework to do and a little bit of time to do it. I'm trying to keep up on blog posts, but you know how it gets during the semester. Luckily this is my last one. When I don't have time to write blog posts I do reblog important posts on the tumblr.

Today! You should feel victorious and galvanized. Big things are happening for women and equality today and I want you to be a part of it.

I have three things for you to do today in the moments that you read this:

1. Sign the petition for birth control. (copied from an email from Planned Parenthood)

We recently secured a major victory for women's health when the Obama administration issued a rule requiring all employers to provide coverage for birth control with no co-pays. Now, women are in danger of losing these protections as birth control opponents pressure President Obama to reverse his decision.

It's up to us to show President Obama just how many people are willing to stand up and protect access to birth control for all women. If 25,000 of us sign this petition, the White House will respond. It takes just two minutes to log in (you will need to create a whitehouse.gov account if you don't already have one) and add your name — click here.

We need President Obama to stand strong — and the best way to make sure that happens is to make so much noise that we can't be ignored. The White House will respond to any petition that gets 25,000 signatures. Birth control opponents have their own petition up and are nearing the 25,000 threshold. I know we can reach that number too — but I want to do more. I want to prove just how strong the movement to protect women's health is. I want to show that we will not stop fighting to defend access to care, no matter what.

We need every person who believes that birth control is essential health care to sign the petition. Everyone who believes that women and their doctors, not their employers, should be making personal medical decisions. Everyone who wants President Obama to stand strong by his commitment to women's health. Are you in? Click here to add your name.

2. Read and SPREAD the word on Prop 8!! It has been declared unconstitutional!!

3. Feel galvanized and do something great for your community or country.

Have a great Tuesday,
Raewyn

Why Girls Hate Each Other

2012-02-04T11:02:00.000-08:00

I couldn't have said it better. WQ.

Women's Healthcare

2012-02-03T20:24:00.000-08:00

The latest vlog on Women's healthcare and birth control!

Judgement?

2012-02-02T09:16:00.001-08:00

What are your thoughts on tattoos?

This article was reposted in it’s entirety from The Spectrum, the independent publication for the University of Buffalo.

Article by Lisa Khoury

I get it. It’s the 21st century. You’re cool, you’re rebellious, you’re cutting edge, you have a point to prove, and you’re a woman. Awesome.
Ladies, I know you’re at least at the legal age of making your own decisions, but before you decide to get a tattoo, allow me to let you in on a little secret. A secret you may have not fully realized yet thus far in your life. What you must understand is, as women, we are – naturally – beautiful creatures.
Seriously, though. Your body literally has the ability to turn heads. Guys drool over us. We hold some serious power in our hands, because – as corny as this sounds – we hold the world’s beauty.
But something girls seem to forget nowadays, or maybe have not been taught, is that women hold the world’s class and elegance in their hands, as well. So what’s more attractive than a girl with a nice body? I’ll tell you what: a girl with class. Looks may not last, but class does. And so do tattoos.
An elegant woman does not vandalize the temple she has been blessed with as her body. She appreciates it. She flaunts it. She’s not happy with it? She goes to the gym. She dresses it up in lavish, fun, trendy clothes, enjoying trips to the mall with her girlfriends. She accentuates her legs with high heels. She gets her nails done. She enjoys the finer things in life, all with the body she was blessed with.
But marking it up with ink? That’s just not necessary.
I’m not here to say a girl should walk around flaunting her body like it’s her job – that’s just degrading. Instead of getting a tattoo, a more productive use of your time would be improving and appreciating the body you have been given, not permanently engraving it.
Can you get meaning out of a tattoo? Arguably. If you want to insert ink into your skin as a symbol for something greater than yourself, then maybe you are proving a point to yourself or the rest of the world.
But at the end of the day, are you really a happier person? Has this tattoo, for instance, caused you to learn something new about yourself? Has it challenged you? Has it led you to self-growth? Nothing comes out of getting a tattoo. You get a tattoo, and that’s it. You do something productive, though, and you see results. That’s a genuine, satisfying change in life. Not ink.
Invest your time, money, and effort into a gym membership, or yoga classes, or new clothes, or experimenting with different hairstyles if you’re craving something new with your body, not a tattoo.
I promise, it will be a much more rewarding experience, and you won’t find yourself in a rut when your future grandkids ask you what’s up with the angel wings on your upper back as you’re in the middle of giving them a life lesson on the importance of values and morals.
God knows the last thing this world needs is another generation of kids questioning their basic values and morals.

Email: lisa.khoury@ubspectrum.com

Have you ever been so lost?

2012-01-30T13:53:00.000-08:00

The Katy Perry song "Lost" keeps playing in my head when I think about this subject.

"Have you ever been so lost? / Known the way / and still so lost?"

Sometimes as girls we get a little silly. We get a little silly and forget who we are. We know the way, but we're still so lost.

Now, boys don't always have to be the reason of our forgetfulness (though they often are) - it could be a new job or a new group of friend. Everyone and everything are going to change you but you can control the extent.

Warrior Queens like to be themselves through and through.

There's a difference between becoming enlightened and discovering a new passion and losing oneself because of a fad or another person.

For example, my boyfriend likes football. So I watch it with him and attempt to learn about it and discover who my favorite team is. I'm not out there buying his favorite player's jersey and clearing my schedule on Sundays and Monday nights.

What I'm doing is normal. The last part is...not. It's unhealthy.

The way I think about it is this: if you become interested in something for someone else, what will happen if that person leaves? Especially if you've already bought tickets to every single game for the next 10 years.

You are going to be lost because you let yourself go.

You forgot what your favorite color was and who you looked up to. Your best friend loves Audrey Hepburn and the color orange and you think Audrey's haughty and orange looks like puke. But you like it because your best friend likes it. So you paint your room orange and put Audrey posters all over the walls. Then the two of you have a huge blow out fight.

But you can't seem to escape the things she likes because they're in your bedroom staring at you...

You think I'm being extreme but this happens everyday.

Please, be yourself,
Raewyn

Ambition: Do It

2012-01-27T09:42:00.000-08:00

So, I'm trying something new. Friday will be VLOG day!! This is an attempt to get more followers and I'm not sure if I will regret this (I'm such an awkward person). But enjoy the first Vlog!

Have a great weekend,
Raewyn

2012 Challenge

2012-01-26T11:38:00.000-08:00

Real fast, let's clear up something. Something that's crucial to your pursuit of life as a Warrior Queen. I have a few questions for you.

1. Do you believe women have rights?
2. Do you want women to have rights?
3. Do you want to make your own choices and decisions?

If you answered yes to one or more of these then i have some BREAKING NEWS for you. You are a feminist. Why? How?

Well, let me refresh your memory on the definition of feminism.

If you, as a female, make your own choices on clothes, school, food, relationship, everyday life, etc, then you are a feminist - and a lucky one at that. You have rights, unlike other feminists in other countries.

Ladies, you HAVE to be a feminist, so why not embrace it? I know you don't want someone to tell you what to do with your life - that's why you're here.

We're rebelling, but don't worry you don't have to get your hands dirty unless you want to).

The Top 10 Warrior Queen Ways to be a Feminist

1. Use your rights - go vote.
2. Follow your dreams.
3. Do what you want.
4. Take a gender and women studies course.
5. Learn about / know about the women you have to thank for your rights.
6. Volunteer at a women's center.
7. Write a guest blog for WQ
8. Know what's going on in the world.
9. Be a strong role model to the girls and women in your life.
10. Most importantly, identify yourself as a feminist. It's the only way to get rid of that negative stigma.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to at least do number 10, but to try every one of these suggestions - and more.

Do you accept?
Raewyn

Survival and Self-Defense

2012-01-25T10:23:00.000-08:00

Good morning,

And yes, I say good morning because this picture was taken at the airport on my return trip from North Carolina early Friday morning. When I say early, I mean this Cali girl left on an adventure to the airport at 7am, east coast time. ((I am hardly a morning person on Cali time......add in 3 hours ahead and I'm a wreck. I was the biggest insomniac when I went to school in Ohio and for the first year of me being home)).

Anyway, back to the issue at hand. ADVENTURES and, I suppose, their dangers. Who doesn't love an adventure? I swear there's a story here that's more than just having fun. It's going to be full of confidence and is the perfect example of what a WQ can do...and that is: To Survive On Her Own.

Bear with me for this story, I'll emphasize the important parts.

I'm from LA, but not downtown. Alright, I spent my formidable years in the OC bubble and have always been very protected. When I moved to Columbus my eyes were opened to something I knew of, but had never experienced. Big city. What I mean is violence, poverty, and homeless people. Columbus is the capitol of Ohio so it had some issues that made the city dangerous. Mostly dangerous at night. Through awareness I survived though, and that was something I remembered on my NC trip.

Leaving Greensboro, I had to take the train to Durham, walk a quarter mile to the bus station, and take two buses to the airport. Simple enough, right? But kind of scary when you think of all of the strangers out there (and when you suffer from an anxiety disorder).

Walking on my way, I knew that I would be okay though. Not because I lived in Columbus for two years. Not because I'm from LA. But because I was walking with a purpose. I was determined, and determined people are rarely approached by people looking for something shady.

I took a few of the tips from "The Top Ten Things Every Woman Should Know About Personal Safety:"

1. Awareness: Your first line of defence. Most people think of kicks to the groin and blocking punches when they hear the term “self-defence.” However, true self-defence begins long before any actual physical contact. The first, and probably most important, component in self-defence is awareness: awareness of yourself, your surroundings, and your potential attacker’s likely strategies.

The criminal’s primary strategy is to use the advantage of surprise. Studies have shown that criminals are adept at choosing targets who appear to be unaware of what is going on around them. By being aware of your surroundings and by projecting a “force presence,” many altercations which are commonplace on the street can be avoided.

2. Use your sixth sense. “Sixth sense.” “Gut instinct.” Whatever you call it, your intuition is a powerful subconscious insight into situations and people. All of us, especially women, have this gift, but very few of us pay attention to it. Learn to trust this power and use it to your full advantage. Avoid a person or a situation which does not “feel” safe–you’re probably right.

4. Escape: Always your best option. What if the unthinkable happens? You are suddenly confronted by a predator who demands that you go with him–be it in a car, or into an alley, or a building. It would seem prudent to obey, but you must never leave the primary crime scene. You are far more likely to be killed or seriously injured if you go with the predator than if you run away (even if he promises not to hurt you). Run away, yell for help, throw a rock through a store or car window–do whatever you can to attract attention. And if the criminal is after your purse or other material items, throw them one way while you run the other.

5. Your right to fight. Unfortunately, no matter how diligently we practice awareness and avoidance techniques, we may find ourselves in a physical confrontation. Whether or not you have self-defence training, and no matter what your age or physical condition, it is important to understand that you CAN and SHOULD defend yourself physically. You have both the moral and legal right to do so, even if the attacker is only threatening you and hasn’t struck first. Many women worry that they will anger the attacker and get hurt worse if they defend themselves, but statistics clearly show that your odds of survival are far greater if you do fight back. Aim for the eyes first and the groin second. Remember, though, to use the element of surprise to your advantage–strike quickly, and mean business. You may only get one chance.

6. Pepper spray: Pros and cons. Pepper spray, like other self-defence aids, can be a useful tool. However, it is important to understand that there can be significant drawbacks to its use. For example, did you know that it doesn’t work on everyone? Surprisingly, 15-20% of people will not be incapacitated even by a full-face spray. Also, if you’re carrying it in your purse, you will only waste time and alert the attacker to your intentions while you fumble for it. Never depend on any self-defence tool or weapon to stop an attacker. Trust your body and your wits, which you can always depend on in the event of an attack.

I want you to know that you can have the confidence to walk in MOST places and that you should feel secure in yourself. Always, if you feel scared, ask an employee (security, or 911) to escort you. They would rather you be safe, than have to deal with the aftermath of something awful.

Raewyn

Positive feedback

2012-01-24T10:56:00.000-08:00

(source: http://allysontiglao.tumblr.com/post/16136078805/warrior-queens)

The other day I received the best positive feedback for Warrior Queen that I could ever get.

Peer feedback is important to everyone, no matter your age or rank. To know that you are doing right by someone who has been exposed to the same things as you, and who is not of your group of friends - or even someone who knows you is inspiring.

This message came on my WQ blog posted last Thursday - entitled Warrior Queens. I posted it on the Tumblr, in hopes that someone who doesn't frequent this website would read it, like it, feel inspired by it and, it worked. The post was reblogged with the message above to all of her followers.

((I'm a lot more active on the Tumblr because there are more followers and it is easier to reblog things, without worrying about infringing on someone else's copyright. I'm always very careful on this website to attribute, but on Tumblr, it is done automatically.))

This follower told her followers to keep an eye out for WQ because the movement's going to go big -- my dreams are going to come true. That's why Warrior Queen is being trademarked, and that's why as soon as it is I'm making us rubber bracelets, stickers and...maybe even t-shirts? Let me know!

On the topic of positive feedback, if you ever feel like you are unsure of something or need a second opinion, feel free to message me anything at beawarriorqueen@gmail.com. I will proofread, help with ideas, help you get your point across, etc. Words are my escape, but I know some people have trouble with it and a lot of people have been given negative feedback their whole lives on it.

Not only that, but I want you to know that YOU are special and deserve positive feedback. You deserve something special in your life. I hope you find it, I will help you find it.

Have a great day,
Raewyn

P.S. Thank you to EVERYONE who gives me feedback on this; I am only highlighting this instance because it is WQ affecting someone who has not met me personally and witnessed my passion.

Positivity Challenge

2012-01-23T11:01:00.000-08:00

WOW! Can you say Warrior Queen? This is Claire Wineland, and she has cystic fibrosis. My mother sent me her video from PositivelyPositive the other night and I couldn't help but share with all of you...and at the same time...extend her challenge to you.

Will you accept it?
Raewyn

For more on Claire visit her website

Inspire

2012-01-20T12:06:00.000-08:00

It's hard to inspire on a daily basis. Some days are harder than others and when people are relying on you to say the right thing and to help them, it can be a bit scary.

But that's okay too.

Think of all of the people in your life who inspire you, sometimes without meaning to. You have your usual people - family members, mentors, teachers, and friends. But then you also have the people who aren't quite so known or recognized. The random stranger you met at the bus stop who did something nice for the person sitting next to them. Maybe it's something you read online. At any rate, you're inspired to do something and no matter how long that something or the resolve lasts...you still did it. For a moment, you were inspired.

That leaves a wonderful feeling inside. Living an inspired life is uplifting, and kind of like the world's best kept secret.

Inspiration is everywhere but too many people go through the motions to truly see it. Too many people get caught up in the what if and in the mundane to really grasp that it's all okay. Living a positive and inspired life is rewarding, and you'll find yourself healthier and making better decisions too.

When we're inspired we do the best things. We find ourselves snapping at people less, loving our jobs and helping those in need because the bad things don't seem to matter just as much as they did yesterday before you were inspired.

Inspiration is hope.

When you're inspired you also inspire others, and that's something that I always strive for. But on a daily basis I sit at my computer screen and think, how in the world can I inspire someone today? What topic haven't I covered. Then I get inspired all over again and I find something - anything - to write about and for you to eat it up.

Being inspiring is not something you can control, and don't think of it as something that is a burden. Like mentioned above, we're all going to have our off days on life where we'd rather lay in bed eating junk food and watching sappy movies than do anything positive. Or the days when we just want to scream at everyone because nothing seems to be going right.

That's okay. You'll be inspired again tomorrow.
Raewyn

Warrior Queens

2012-01-19T12:11:00.000-08:00

Hi guys,

Sorry for the week-long hiatus. I went on vacation for my last week of winter break and am currently in North Carolina. I found some time to write for you guys and it's about something very important that happened to me last week :)

Have you met the original WQs? The girls who got me through high school with the WQ philosophy. The girls who were going to get WQ tattoos with me? Well, there was a group of us...I want to say 5 or 6 who started calling ourselves WQ back in the day.

A few of some of the original WQs (I'm in the middle)

Now, the idea was started by Sasha after she read "The Rules", "He's Just Not That Into You" and "Why Men Love Bitches."

She introduced it to me and I introduced it to the other girls and soon enough we were all living and breathing it and writing WQ on our hands and wrists to remind ourselves to STAY STRONG.

Originally, it revolved around boys (of course) and in staying strong when we liked a guy. We weren't going to be manipulated, we weren't going to text boys constantly wondering WHY ISN'T HE TALKING TO ME! No, that's because we read what we considered the WQ bible (Why Men Love Bitches by Sherry Argov).

Then without us realizing it, it morphed into our whole lives. We were realizing that by acting strong and confident and in control of ourselves, the rest of our lives were changing for the better. We took a positive outlook. Now, it's been many years since that all began, and there have been countless other girls joining in the WQ movement - some of which you've heard from on here. It's only going to get bigger.

So I guess this post is a little bit introduction, a little bit nostalgic, and a little bit of a reminder to all of my WQs out there that times will change and people will grow but you're always going to have someone to be your pillar of strength when times fall short.

Thank you to all of the amazing WQs I have met in the years and to the others I will continue to meet. Whether you came into my life by accident for a short period of time or if you've grown to be one of my closest friends, thank you for the love and support.

Raewyn

Positive or Negative, it's all in the way you look at it

2012-01-12T09:56:00.000-08:00

Plus signs are generally a good thing. Put one behind an A, and you feel a rush of pride. Put one in frontof stock market fluctuations, and you’ve earned money. Put one inbetween two numbers, and suddenly you have more than you started outwith.

At 17, I had a plan. A plan that I hadenvisioned since before I can even clearly remember. Growing up inprivate prep schools there was an order to life- you worked hard inhigh school to get into a top college. You graduated from that topcollege and went onto graduate school, marriage, a house with a whitepicket fence and kids. In that order. No deviations. No exceptions.Up until that point, the most I’d strayed from “the plan” wasgetting accepted into Harvard instead of my top choice, Princeton.Obviously, I was on the right track. My life was full of positives.But, there was one positive I wasn’t expecting looming on thehorizon.

When I found myself staring at a small,but shockingly pink, plus sign practically screaming at me from thetip of a little white stick, I had a hard time finding anything evenremotely positive about the symbol. Suddenly, that positive signlooked far, far worse than any other sign I could think of. Thatpositive started to look more like a negative. Those two little linessubtracting every dream, every aspiration, every vision I had ofmyself in the near future. Negating life as I knew it.

I thought through all my options. As amodern day woman in the US, I was lucky that I had options toconsider. But in the end, I did what was right for me. I decided tohave, and keep, my son. Even though I had made my choice, the followthrough was still anything but easy. One by one all my life’spositives seemed to fall by the wayside. The negatives piled on as Iwatched all my friends leave for distant, exclusive colleges, leavingme behind. My relationship with my father (angry about my pregnancy)completely deteriorated to the point where we were no longer onspeaking terms, and my mother, although supportive, seemed to look atme like I was not the same person anymore. Although I was now marriedto my son’s father (whom I loved and who was completely supportive)and I was expecting our first child, I could find no happiness in it.My life, it seemed to me, was now one glaring negative after theother. I had no idea who I was, or where I was headed. That littlepink positive sign had stolen my chance at my dream life and with itwho I was as a person.

And then my son was born. Andeverything changed. Or really, nothing changed-except for me. Havingmy son reawakened my inner Warrior Queen. The spark inside of me thathad lay dormant since that fateful day suddenly re-emerged. Irealized something that day that I now try to remember always. If youtake nothing else from my story, I hope that you can at least takethis:

Your mistakes, no matter how big,do not define your life. They refine it.

My pregnancy 5 years ago seemed to meto be the single worst thing to ever happen to me. Now, I see it asthe greatest defining moment of my entire life. You are only human.Life will not always go according to your plan. Life will not alwaysbe full of positives. Sometimes, there will be situations you face,or mistakes that you make that will seem to “subtract” everypositive from your day, your week, your year…. may be even yourwhole life. But those negatives, big or small, can ever be enough tonegate all the positives. Those negatives do change you, yes. Butwith every mistake-every negative- comes growth, learning andrefinement. Your mistakes make you into the woman you are- and thewoman you will become. They help to fuel and strengthen your innerWarrior Queen. They shape you into the best “you” that you canbe. Changed, but better.

And that, in itself, is the biggestpositive of all.

[This blog was written by a friend of mine that I've known since I was 3 years old. She's one of the biggest Warrior Queen's I know and I am beyond HAPPY to introduce her as our newest blogger. I will have her write a little intro on the next one - this piece was just too well written in the beginning to preface it with anything. - Raewyn]

Recipe Time!

2012-01-11T16:10:00.000-08:00

Today, I have a lot to do with schoolwork (even though school starts in 2 weeks), so I decided to leave you all with something fun! Baking is one of my favorite activities to do anytime, but especially when I'm stressed out. It's a great relaxer. Right before finals I made these with one of my friends and, I think you will love them if you're a Nutella Nut like me...

Enjoy!
Raewyn

Nutella Swirl Brownie Bites

Recipe adapted from Broma Bakery

Ingredients:

4 (one ounce) squares of Bakers unsweetened chocolate

3/4 cup butter

2 cups sugar (or 1 1/2 cups if you want them a little less sweet)

3 eggs

1 tsp. vanilla

1 cup flour

1/2 cup Nutella

Directions:

Heat oven to 350°F.
Line a 24 mini muffin tin with muffin liners.
Microwave chocolate and butter in microwaveable bowl on high for 2 minutes or until butter is melted. Stir until chocolate is completely melted (it takes a little while).
Put the sugar in a large mixing bowl. Add the butter/chocolate mixture to the sugar and stir until blended. Add the eggs and vanilla and beat until smooth. Now gradually add flour and mix well.
Use a small cookie/ice cream scoop to divide the batter into the muffin tins.
Put a small dollop of nutella on top of each brownie bite. Now take toothpick and swirl the nutella into the brownie (don’t mix it in, just swirl).
Put in oven and bake from 12-15 minutes.

(I got this recipe from http://www.justeverydayme.com/nutella-swirl-brownie-bites/)

Bittersweet Tastes

2012-01-10T17:29:00.000-08:00

Disappointment doesn't have to always leave a bitter taste in your mouth, though most days and most people will tell you it does. Disappointment is easy to come by with the high expectations we have for ourselves and others. Having high hopes is not necessarily bad though, it's all in how you deal with it.

Last night, I discovered that I cannot do the internship this summer that I so wanted to do. I thought this internship would be the next step closer to making this into a full blown movement and, of course a magazine. I want to help people and I want to see how a movement is run. What are the best ways for the grass roots to spread?

I had my hopes set on this internship and even began saving money for it (it's unpaid.) Last night, I was disappointed, heart broken and a bit discouraged; but today, I have decided this is more bittersweet than crushing. But wait a second, why?

I thought this internship was the next step, but maybe it's not. Maybe there's something better planned for my next step for this summer. Maybe, something big is going to happen. I mean, I know something big is going to happen, big things always happen in my life - but maybe this is something big for the movement.

You see, I graduate on May 22, and I thought that I was going to have to skip graduation to go to the internship, something I was initially bittersweet about. But the internship actually starts the week of finals, which cannot be missed or rescheduled. Did I mention this internship is in Florida? So now, I get to walk at my college graduation - a once in a lifetime experience.

For Christmas, I asked for money from family members so I could afford this internship. I was looking at needing about 10,000 dollars for 3 months (it's unpaid and I would need room and board, gas, my regular bills, etc). It was probably very unlikely I'd have made that much money for the internship, but I was determined. Since my family gave me money though, I now have a surplus of money for Warrior Queen disposal. So that means we might get the things we want / need like t-shirts and promo.

So now, I start the search for a career after college, and exciting Warrior Queen stuff on the way!

Happy Tuesday,
Raewyn

Girl's Date

2012-01-09T12:28:00.000-08:00

I like to go on girl dates. I like to go have lunch or dinner or an exciting adventure that some people would consider a good idea to do on a date, with my friends.

Have you ever tried it? Planned a day with a close friend to do something that is just the two of you? It's a great way to have a little escape and it's a little more than just a simple hang out.

I usually plan girl dates when I haven't seen a friend in awhile and we have a lot of catching up to do. We like to plan something special, and yesterday, I went to tea.

My friend B and I were best friends in high school but had a falling out senior year and, since then have rekindled, but our lives are so much more hectic now that we rarely get to see each other (factor in 100 miles distance between our houses).

Here's our perfect girl date! I hope you enjoy it (or something similar) with a close friend soon!

We arrived downtown around 1 PM with reservations at the tea place (just go on google and search tea salons in your area) for 230. B and I have an addiction problem with vintage shopping: she loves everything 1920s and soft and pink. I'm more of a 1950s, loud colors and punk rock type of girl. We both fell in love with something we couldn't afford (tea sets and vintage hats), promising ourselves we'd return someday or have enough money someday to own all of the vintage things we love.

As we arrived at the tea salon, we decided to do "Tea For Two" (it was in French though).
2 scones with creme and jam
6 assorted tea sandwiches
6 assorted petit fours
This was for 44 dollars, which is a normal price, usually from 20-30 dollars a person depending on how fancy you want to go.

We laughed, we ate, we sipped our teas and we watched all of the people around us. There's always an assortment of people - young girls, kids, old ladies, flamboyant ladies, and we even saw a couple for the first time yesterday.

It was such a much needed break, and in our hectic lives sometimes we need to plan those days.

Try drinking tea, too; it's so relaxing :)

Happy Monday!
Raewyn

New Year, New You

2012-01-07T13:07:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone! My name is Rachel. I am a Licensed Esthetician and a proud follower of the Warrior Queen movement. I fully support the idea of being yourself and loving every part of what makes you, YOU. I am going to share with you some of my knowledge of skin care in order for you to continue the self love. Please enjoy this post from my beauty blog, Upon Glamour Creations. :)

The New Year is a time of reevaluation, revamping, and reorganizing yourself! Most of us make resolutions at the end of the year to try and accomplish in the upcoming year. If we stick to those resolutions or not, is a whole other story. :P

This year make a resolution to better yourself! What better way to kick start that self conquest than to take care of your skin. Nothing is more powerful than feeling confident in yourself. With clear skin, you will have an advantage.

Skin Care Regimes can be obnoxious and time consuming. Sometimes, they can even be considered overwhelming. However, with self discipline and a little bit of will power you will be able to stick to it and achieve amazing results.

Below are a couple examples of skin care regimes that you can start for the new you!

THE BASIC

A lot of the time, we don’t have a lot of time. Constantly being rushed out the door and getting home just early enough to eat a quick dinner and hop into bed. With crazy schedules, your skin is the last priority on the list. Here is a skin regime that is simple and easy to follow for those busy bees :)

Cleanse- Depending on your skin type, get a cleanser that works for your skin. (Dry: Moisturizing cleanser; Oily: Foam or Gel Cleanser; Acneic: Salicylic Acid, Benzoyl Peroxide; Sensitive: try Cetaphil products.)DO THIS TWICE A DAY. It only takes about a minute to wash your face in the morning and night. Take those 2 minutes in your day to wash your face and you shall see a difference.
Tone- Any astringent will work. Witch Hazel is a good natural toner you can use on a daily basis. Do this whenever you like to set your skin’s natural pH back to normal and to kill bacteria that you encounter during the day.
Moisturize/Sun Screen- Never skip this step! It is always important to keep your skin hydrated and protected from UV rays.

THE SKIN-A-HOLIC

Ever met those people who are constantly obsessing over their skin? Well now you can be just like them. With this skin care regime you can be just as addicted. (in a good way of course!)

Cleanse- 2x a day (See above for what type cleanser is recommended for you.)
Exfoliate- 3x a week (Homemade or store bought scrubs will work. You can see my previous blogs to get scrub recipes, or ideas of what to use. )
Mask- 1x a week (Depending on your skin type use a mask at least once a week. Hint: Clay masks are great for oily skin types and contracting pores.)
Drink your Water- (Cannot stress this enough!!! 1/2 your weight=ounces of water you should be drinking daily)
Pore Strips/Extractors- Pore strips can help loosen up black heads and clogged pores mainly on the nose and chin. Extractors, although not recommended for use by those who are not properly trained, can help get out stubborn black heads.
Tone- As much as you would like
Moisturize/Sun Screen- All day, everyday :)

THE ENVIRONMENTALIST

This is for those who are all about using the all natural method. Fruits, veggies and grains are all used in this regime.

Cleanse-1-2x a day. There are many natural ingredients that you can use to cleanse your face. Here are a few that you may use:

Yogurt Cleanser: Yogurt contains natural alpha hydroxy acids which gently exfoliate while avoiding irritation to your skin. Use organic, full fat yogurt for the best results.
Honey Cleanser: Apply to face diluted with some water. Honey is a natural moisturizer. It also contains antibacterial and anti inflammatory ingredients which will help with acne and other skin rashes.
Olive Oil Cleanser: This method uses olive oil mixed with castor oil. Steam your face first allowing your pore to open up. Apply mixture to face and then gently removed with warm wash cloth.
Oatmeal Cleanser: Grind oatmeal in blender and add water. Apply to face and then wash off.

Exfoliate- 3x a week. Natural exfoliates are simple to make. You can use honey and white sugar, or brown sugar. Salt and olive oil makes a nice scrub as well. You can look up more extravagant scrub recipes as well if you do not want to use the simple scrub methods.
Mask- 1x a week. There are a variety of ingredients that you can use to make facial masks. Depending on skin type and what benefit you want to achieve, the possibilities are quite endless. Honey, Olive Oil, Coconut Oil, Egg yolk, yogurt, tomatoes, cucumbers, oatmeal.. are several ingredients that you can use in a facial mask.
Tone- Witch Hazel and Apple Cider vinegar are great natural remedies that are considered antiseptic.
Moisturize- A drop of olive oil will do the trick.

THE GLAMOUR GODDESS

The Glamour Goddess is a lot like the Skin-a-holic regime. However, you also add in 2 facials with an Esthetician or Dermatologist a month. This also includes treatments such as: chemical peels, microdermabrasions, and the use of electric current (galvanic, tesla high frequency)

I hope you all get off to a good start this year! Choose which regime best fits your lifestyle, or make a combination of them. As long as you stick to it! :) Happy New Year everyone!!!

-Rachel Hoadley L.E

Organizing DIY

2012-01-06T13:26:00.000-08:00

Well, it's the New Year. It's here, HELLO 2012!!

This year's going to be full of craziness, busy-ness and who knows what else but I think it's best to start off the year with a little bit of organization...DIY style :)

Buying a ton of organizational stuff can get expensive, so let's stick to the essentials and make what we can! I've made a list of the stuff that I like to use to keep organized throughout the year and how to make them!

1. Buy a planner. Hands down - the easiest way to stay organized. Pick one that you REALLY like, cause you're stuck with it all year (unless you're like me and have numerous planners...)

2. Make yourself a bulletin board. Go to the hardware store and buy a piece of cork and then get some fabric that fits in your room and cover it. Get some push pins and you're golden! This is the place to put important things you need, memories from the past year, and maybe even some stuff that you WANT (my mom uses hers as a dream board for her house, and somehow she's always ended up finding that expensive furniture for cheaper).

3. Get rid of things! I'm not a hoarder but I have a tendency to keep things I don't need. So the time has come to reevaluate your clothes (that you know you haven't worn in forever), shoes (okay...I'm a shoe-aholic so, I give you permission to keep them all), and anything else you've noticed you haven't used in who know's how long. The next step - donate them to your friends or Goodwill, so someone else can get a great use out of them!

4. Get some plastic storage bins. These are good for almost anything! You can store your clothes for the old season; you can store last semester's papers; and my personal favorite is to turn them into a filing cabinet! If you get folders (or if you're like me and collect folders) you can organize all of your papers that you know you need to keep but aren't sure what to do with.

5. Lastly, stick to it! I'm the worst at sticking with my organizing, but it's quite simple if you get into a routine. Before you go to bed pick up the things you left around your room and put them in their appropriate places and when you wake up in the morning, go over your plans for the day! (If you don't like having a physical planner, you can try Google Calendar and link it to your smart phone or computer desktop.)

Remember, I'll be trying to stay organized like this throughout the year too so don't feel discouraged! We're in this together :)

-Raewyn

The Happy Train

2012-01-05T12:00:00.000-08:00

Re-enacting a scene from A Lot Like Love

The other day I received a text from a friend that read "Somewhere along the way I feel off the train to happiness and I feel like you were helping me stay on that train SO I want to thank you along with tell you that I want to get back on that train."

I've been thinking about that a little bit, knowing I wanted to write a blog but unsure on what it would entail. I think I've finally figured it out though, after realizing that I'm content with my life, not wanting to change too much right now.

The Happy Train is something that a lot of us jump on, whether you think of it as positive thinking, The Secret or whatever else. There seems to be a crowd of people, myself included, who seem to easily be able to pull up happy thoughts about their lives at a moment's notice. Others have to work a little bit harder, but that doesn't mean it's not attainable.

Being happy really changes things for you. Once you decide to be happy, the seeds of happiness have been planted. To decide that even though things might suck - your house could be on fire, your boyfriend could live millions of miles away, you could be bullied at school, what have you - you're going to find it in you to be happy because you deserve it.

That's right, you deserve to be happy.

The way I keep myself on the Happy Train is through daily reevaluations of myself. When things suck I take a step back and think to myself, yeah, things suck and I'm having a ton of panic attacks a day, but you know what...I know that somewhere along the line, something's going to make my smile.

And you know what, something usually makes me smile within just a few minutes of that thought. Unhappiness is not a natural state, it's just an easy state to fall into when you let thoughts and others' actions control you.

So here are my tips for jumping on (and staying on) that Happy Train: consciously think about the things that made you smile throughout the day, do the things you like doing, when you notice you're afraid of something...face your fears, and lastly...always talk to someone you love, because they're sure to bring a smile to your face.

Happy day!
Raewyn

Wordless Wednesday

2012-01-04T12:00:00.000-08:00

So, this was a fun thing my aunt used to do on her blog and I think I want to try it. On Wednesdays, you post a picture of something (hence the wordless) and I want to do something WQ related every week...sooooo here goes!

RESEARCH :)

WQ GOALS for 2012

2012-01-02T12:33:00.000-08:00

Hello,

2012 is our year. That's right I said it. It's going to be the year Warrior Queen really takes off. We've been building up for this, but let me let you in on some really exciting things that we're determined to happen this year.

1. Daily posts on the weekdays.

2. More guest posts.

3. Tumblr input

4. Contests and Promos

5. Stickers

6. Promo post cards

7. Business cards

8. T-shirts??? Wristbands?? Tell me what you guys want :)

9. BE THE CHANGE :)

10. What else should we do this year?

I'm excited, are you? Let's do this!!!!

Be Love,
Raewyn

New Years Resolutions

2012-01-02T12:26:00.000-08:00

I know I periodically share Debbie Puente's columns on here and I think today's is perfect. Here's an excerpt, click read more for the rest (it's short). And prepare for regular posts, I have an idea that I will start working on this week. Things were crazy hectic with the holidays (and getting sick)

Great New Years Resolution Every Woman Should Make
No, not the lose weight or exercise type of resolution—I’m talking about the enhance-your-life-in-the-name-of-friendship resolution.
We have all had our times of self-centeredness, where a friendship gets neglected. Why not make a simple resolution to reconnect with an old friend? If you’re like most people, you have drifted away from a good friend, most likely caused by going in different directions. Perhaps your priorities have shifted back to a place where you can now make time for an important friendship.

Happy End of Finals!

2011-12-16T19:26:00.000-08:00

**studying with my kitten**

How relieved do you feel? I feel soooo relieved, especially with only one semester left for me (till WQ becomes my full time dedication!!)

With the end of finals you should probably first and foremost give a huge sigh of relief!

Inhale. Exhale. Close your eyes!

Man...that felt great :)

I know that your tired brain's telling you to go veg out in front of the tv for your whole Christmas break but I think you should do something a little more worthwhile, like pamper yourself and spend some time with your friends.

For college kids - everyone's coming home and that means crazy nights and best friend time! And high school kids are stoked for the holiday Ugly Sweater parties where they can sneak some drinks in...

Hey guys!! Be safe! There's other cool stuff to do than drink when you're underage. I personally prefer to adventure all over the place doing silly things - and I'm 22.

Maybe it'd be great to go to the beach at night and check out the stars or take a trip to your "candy cane lane" and look at all of the Christmas lights!!

The Boyfriend Question

2011-12-15T11:37:00.000-08:00

Which question you might ask? The why am I dating him? Why do I want to be with him? Why am I thinking about him? Why aren't I running? The list goes on and on.

Basically it comes down to some crazy combination of likes, dislikes, chemistry and other things that no one could really truly explain. But the real question is: how do I stay my independent self while with him??

Here's a list compiled by Rachel and I (our bfs are totally chill, but we want the rest of you to have this too)

1. Set boundaries.
2. Maintain a balance between your relationship and friendships.
3. Pamper yourself.
4. Be sure to set aside time for your school / work / dreams.
5. Don't sacrifice your happiness.
6. Be realistic.
7. Have girlfriend sleepovers on the reg.
8. Take the relationship at your speed.
9. Follow your dreams - a good boyfriend will want to come along for the ride, not to drive the car.
10. Be yourself - this is why he liked you in the first place!!

Staying true to you is the most important part of a relationship!!

"Take me as I am,
as I was meant to be
And if you give a damn
Take me baby
Or leave me"

How has it already been 2 weeks??

2011-11-30T12:51:00.001-08:00

Well, it seems time has flown by in the past 2 weeks. I literally have been too busy to do anything, let alone post one of the many blogs floating around in my head. Soon I will my lovelies...if you wanna see stuff i reblog though that is personal and some WQ stuff my tumblr is: raetothewyn.tumblr.com :)

Passionate

2011-11-14T23:33:00.000-08:00

This was a homework assignment for my internship class, but I thought it might inspire. :)

My Passions
What would you do if you didn't have to worry about money? How big do your dreams go? Without worrying about money, I would change the world.

I'm not joking or being trite either. I would launch a global campaign for young girls. I would reach out to women and girls everywhere. I would travel to inform them and open up their eyes. To what? the warrior queen movement? Of course, but it goes beyond that. I would open their eyes to educate them on everything that the warrior queen movement stands for and everything that I as a person stand for, because I stand for a little more than the warrior queen movement. I care about women's health, emotional well-being and place in the world more than the secular nature I try to keep the warrior queen movement. I live and breathe the movement, it's not something that is questioned. However my passions run deeper than just helping girls know that they are strong.

I guess my passions lie in life. I want to share my passion of life – a happy life – with everyone and to help them see that it is possible to dream big and to achieve and to be yourself. First and foremost, my passion is to always be myself no matter the situation. If I have an emotion or an idea or something I want to talk about, I'm going to share it and I want other people to feel comfortable enough to do the same.

I am also very passionate in writing. Through traveling and changing people and the world, I'd love to change them with my words. I'd love to write books to help others and to share my experiences.

My other big passion is tied into all of them in helping people. I would love to work with numerous charities and organizations to not only broaden my view of the world and of life and to share that with people but to help in whatever way that I can. My biggest inspiration comes from Mother Teresa and Audrey Hepburn, both kind-hearted women who worked to help those in need. I want to be selfless and happy and to help nurture.

A passion not involved with my career would be to be a foster and adoptive mom, although I know that the work is a lot larger than I could imagine. I want to help those who are without a home to feel at home with me, whether it be for an hour or for their life time.

What are your passions?

Disney Princesses

2011-11-08T21:51:00.000-08:00

So I was stumbling around on the internet and I came across these two Disney Princess comparisons / lessons for romance for girls. I think it's an interesting twist on the fairytales that little girls grow up with. Read them!!

http://www.hercampus.com/love/disney-princess-guide-your-not-so-happily-ever-after
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2208847/the_lessons_of_the_disney_princesses.html?cat=40

2011-11-07T22:52:00.001-08:00

Daniela posted this on my wall today! Thought I'd share!!

3 Steps towards Positive Thinking as a Way of Life
Written by Lauren Bailey - 7 CommentsCategories: self improvement

The phrase “positive thinking” has become somewhat of a buzzword in a lot of ways in our culture today. So many books and experts suggest “positive thinking” as a solution to low self esteem and confidence issues without ever really exploring what the phrase means.

Positive thinking involves much more than just deciding one day that you will change the way you think. Obviously, altering the way you think about yourself and the world around you is a difficult task. Oftentimes we fail to sit back and consider that the way in which we think about ourselves and the world very much shapes our world and our lives.

Negative thinking has a way of affecting every aspect of our lives without us even realizing it. So much of our happiness and our success rely on our ability to think positively and create positive situations. However, the trek to a positive attitude and positive self thought is no easy path. Follow these three steps in self improvement to gain the ability to think positively and create a new way of life.

Be Aware: Hear Yourself

Self awareness is an essential step in any form of self improvement. You have to be aware of yourself and the things around you before you can understand them and then learn to change and improve them. Before you can learn to alter your way of thinking you have to be aware of how you think in the first place. Take the time to monitor your thoughts and feeling carefully. Listen to yourself throughout the day. When doing this you may be surprised to find just how much thinking you do that you are not completely aware of throughout the day. Pay attention to those negative beliefs you hold that pop up without you realizing it, listen for negative thoughts, watch for negative actions (and reactions), and pay close attention to negative feelings that arise. All of these things are utterly important to be aware of. You should work hard to be conscience of the vocabulary you use throughout the day. Start by simply changing the words you use. Rather than saying “I have my job,” try rewording and rethinking things to say “I would love to find a new career”. While this may sound trite, merely changing the vocabulary you use is a great start to positive thinking.

Take Responsibility: It’s All about You

One of the most common forms of negative thinking involves placing blame on other things. Of course, we all do this. We point the finger at anything but ourselves at times. This is an easy path to take and a difficult habit to break. By placing the blame for something that is bad on someone else, you take the attention off of yourself. This, of course, is only a temporary fix. Even when we place the blame one someone else, that negative energy is still there. Turing the attention away from ourselves can never lead to a successful solution. After you have worked to become more self aware, you have to learn to take responsibility for your feelings, actions, and thoughts. By taking responsibility for your actions, thoughts, and emotions, they become something that you can control and change. Part of placing blame is believing you are powerless. Take responsibility for yourself and, in turn, gain control of yourself. Only after you admit fault and take responsibility for yourself and your thinking can you successfully alter the way you think and act.

Make the Commitment: Change Your Attitude

Each of these steps in self improvement is equally as important as the next. Without self awareness and acceptance, there is no hope for change. The final step in gaining a positive outlook and positive inner voice is committing to change. You must commit fully to positive self thought. Without total commitment very little progress can be made. This, of course, will inevitably take some time and dedication. With a history of negative thinking and blame, it can be very difficult to change our ways. Much of that thinking has become a natural response to our actions and our environment. For this reason, it is essential that you fully commit to creating a more positive inner voice for yourself. Create goals for new beliefs, new outlooks on certain things, and new distinctions for things. Make the commitment to creating a healthier self and a happier mind. By thinking positively and owning our thoughts we can learn to control our situation and master our bad moods.

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/3-steps-towards-positive-thinking-as-a-way-of-life/#more-7706

Olbermann: Gay marriage is a question of love

2011-11-05T15:42:00.000-07:00

I have to read this for my class and I was wondering your thoughts on this. Take just 5 minutes and watch it :)

Olbermann: Gay marriage is a question of love

Cultivating your Friendship Garden

2011-11-01T08:30:00.000-07:00

I found this written out from my drafts in July and I think it's very funny that in the cycles of life people fall back into this. What are your thoughts on it?

So, I'm going to use an analogy which is probably going to sound reallly bad, but it's got the same idea as the treasure chest analogy. But here it goes:

Sometimes, you've got to weed out the people who aren't on the same friendship page as you. They're just going to ruin the garden that is your life. But sometimes, the weeds end up to be the best friends and the prettiest flowers of the bunch.

Here's what I'm saying: Friendships are about giving and loving. When one side falls short, the other side can't always pick up all of the slack and then everything tips off the scale and the friendship's over. But sometimes, those weeds -- those people who you've ended friendships with are still reconcilable. You just find out later on in life.

I've been feeling this way lately. I surround myself with friends, whether it's in person, online, via the phone, long distance...all of it. I love friendships and interpersonal relationships. That's my life right there. All of the material things don't matter to me. If I had them and no friends, I would be unable to survive.

But it seems in the past year, that I've had friendships just end. At first I had a little panic: OMG AM I A BAD FRIEND?!

Okay, I know I'm not. Everyone has their moments at being selfish or a bad friend, but i tend to sacrifice more than is necessary or common because of my dependence on friendship. But then I realized...why am i putting all of this effort into cultivating this weed that is not enhancing my garden at all. It's looking like a tall reed among my flowers, instead of a weedy flower.

So I just stopped. I needed a break from cultivating. I nursed the flowers that I could reach, and I relied on the self-sustainability of the rest. You see, I've always been under the impression that if two people in a friendship don't speak for a month or two, or even a year, it doesn't mean the friendship is over. It just means those people are busy. When one person notices, they contact the other and the friendship rekindles. If someone has an issue in a friendship, it's respectful to notify the other person and the issue can be solved.

I guess a lot of people don't see things quite this way. They view it as, if I don't talk to you for a few months I don't care about our friendship at all, so it's obviously over so we're just not going to be friends anymore. They might even delete me from FaceBook (ohhhhh the horror!!!)

The thing with life is, it happens and if you think things are black and white, you're sadly mistaken. Everyone's got their own things going on. So if I'm not talking to you, I'm probably busy. If I have a problem with you, I will tell you. Let's make this all as simple as we can because everything is shades of grey. Let's just each show each other love, and we won't have to worry about not being friends.

Chaotic

2011-11-01T08:26:00.000-07:00

"Living without chaos, is like making something without a mess: no fun and far too cookie-cutter for me."

Do you prefer the cookie-cutter to the chaos?

Think about it

2011-11-01T08:21:00.000-07:00

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." - Robert Brault

How does this make you feel today? I always try to embrace the little things... :)

Things have been a little crazy...

2011-10-27T21:27:00.000-07:00

okay but when aren't they? Since I haven't been procrastinating homework this week I haven't been looking up things online and being inspired for blogs. SO I will just post some images I found on Tumblr :)

Rachel's Words of Wisdom

2011-10-25T12:31:00.000-07:00

You probably haven't met Rachel yet. She's outspoken and amazing and the designer of the logo / tattoo that currently resides on my wrist. She's also one of my biggest sources of strength. I don't know why she doesn't just post on here on her own (hint hint nudge nudge Rach) buuuuut she did post this on tumblr and give me permission to share with you.

Every day, look in the mirror and tell yourself that you’re beautiful. You must learn to love yourself before you can love someone else. You are forced to live with yourself, so you might as well learn to love YOU. No one knows you better than you do. And only you know what you’re truly thinking. Take a moment to think about what you’re good at, what your strong points are, what makes you different from anyone else. Smile, for you have gotten to live another day.. And be happy for all that you have.. And not sad for all that you don’t. To be loved by yourself is far more powerful than to be loved by others. Never tell yourself you can’t do something.. Giving up isn’t an option. LOVE is POWER. :)

Have a great afternoon -- I've got another blog about domestic abuse, 7 billion people orrr something completely different to follow :)

Op-Ed piece for class

2011-10-24T14:48:00.000-07:00

This is totally NOT WQ related but I think that everyone should know about this. Obviously this is an opinion piece I wrote for class. There are facts but it's meant to persuade. Go research the topic if it strikes a chord with you.

Mexico is right there. What separates the US and Mexico at some points seems to be nothing more than the sense of entitlement that Americans seem to have. At that borderline there are no language barriers; people who live that close speak more Spanish than English anyway. And is the US public aware that across this border – less than 50 miles from some cities in Texas a war for drugs exists.

That’s right, a war for drugs. This is not a war on drugs like the US and Mexican governments want us to believe. In these dinghy towns – particularly Juarez – everything exists to provide America with cocaine.

It’s time to stop being naive and think that the US has nothing to do with this. It’s time to stop thinking that these murders, disappearances, rapes and abundance of drug trafficking has nothing to do with American citizens and cannot affect them.

Who’s to say that an American vacationer won’t accidentally end up disappeared, raped, or murdered for being in the wrong place at the wrong time? It happens. Visitors to Mexico are warned not to leave their resorts because the safety ends there.

America, it’s time to stop ignoring this problem threatening to overspill into the US; it’s time to take the blindfold off of our eyes and see that existing in Mexico is dangerous.

To fix this problem would be to fix the US immigration problem. According to an article in the El Paso Times, the city closest to Juarez which houses many Juarez officials who are too fearful to live in the city they represent, “25,223 political asylum applications from Mexican citizens were filed between 2006 and 2010, but only 822 were granted, which amounts to 3.3 percent.” But these are only the numbers of those who applied for political asylum, and do not include the countless Mexicans fleeing to America illegally.

These people are not applying for asylum because the economy is bad in Mexico and want to take US jobs. They literally fear for their lives. They flee a government and a system that the US government supports outright. Yet, US border patrol works daily to strengthen our borders.

“Give me your tired, your poor,

Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,

The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.

Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me.

I lift my lamp beside the golden door.”

Unless of course, you’re fleeing a government that the US supports.

50 Dating Rules for Smart Girls Who Don’t Need Dating Rules

2011-10-20T18:50:00.000-07:00

TO MY WQs:

50 Dating Rules for Smart Girls Who Don’t Need Dating Rules

I got a laugh. Enjoy <3

Get Help :)

2011-10-20T10:26:00.000-07:00

This is something that is obviously something very close to my heart since I struggle with anxiety caused by my OCD and the need to always be in control. If you feel like you have anxiety or depression or any other mental health issue go to the doctors. Even if you are having temporary anxiety due to stress, therapists and doctors are THE biggest help when you find the right one. Here's an article for that:

http://www.girlshealth.gov/feelings/therapy/index.cfm

Have a great day <3

UN Women Fund for Gender Equality

2011-10-19T10:57:00.000-07:00

Do you follow our twitter? @beawarriorqueen?

If you do you've seen some of the RTs from UN Women in the past day or so because they've been doing a lot. I wanted to expand upon it and open up a forum for conversation on women globally and just to get an input on what you girls think should be important in our lives. Do you agree with what UN Women do? Do you disagree? Are you indifferent? What do you think girls should focus on? Are you content with the way you live your life or do you feel trapped some of the times because you are female?

I know I've always felt a little bit restricted and try to work toward making it a little better for us girls out there....making us realize that we have such amazing potential. Here's your chance to be a little more aware:

Women make up more than half the world’s population, but the majority of them live in poverty. For their lives to change, they need access to and control of economic resources and political power: to speak out, run for office, and support themselves and their families.UN Women’s Fund for Gender Equality helps change the lives of women all over the world. The Fund’s goal is to advance women’s economic and political empowerment through high-impact, multi-year grants of up to USD 5 million.
The money is awarded directly to women’s organizations and partnerships between governmental and nongovernmental organizations (NGOs). Spain’s donation of USD 65 million started the Fund in 2009, followed by Norway’s USD 3 million, and Mexico’s USD 800,000. The Fund totals USD 69.5 million and is one of the largest and most recent grantmaking funds dedicated to women’s rights and empowerment globally.
Since its launch in 2009, the Fund has invested USD 37.5 million in multi-year grants to 40 programmes in 35 countries. To be approved, grants must meet the highest standards and are continually monitored for effectiveness.
GRANTEES ARE HAVING AN IMPACT
In El Salvador in March 2011, advocates helped pass a national gender equity law. In China, women of three rural provinces are demanding a place at the table and training female candidates to take a greater role in government decision-making. In Sri Lanka, a broad-based multimedia effort is training women of ethnic and religious minorities to run for office. These projects meet the Fund’s aim of political empowerment that strengthens women’s leadership — particularly of young women, indigenous women, refugee women and HIV-positive women — increasing their participation and influence in decision-making in all areas of life.
In Rwanda, 15,000 women are being helped to register to inherit and own land and property — rights only recently granted by law. In India, an effort to equip Dalit women to lobby and take advantage of new government programmes resulted in 7,200 women’s obtaining work. In Morocco, women living in 13 oasis communities are gaining both independence and income through vibrant cooperatives. These projects meet the Fund’s goal of increasing women’s economic empowerment, increasing women’s access to and control over goods, income, and land.
The Fund works on local, national and international levels. It supports the gender equality laws and policies of individual nations. It also helps the world make progress in attaining gender equality goals enshrined in international agreements, such as the Millennium Development Goals (MDGs) and the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination against Women (CEDAW), among others.
For instructions on how to apply, please consult the Application Guidelines. If you have questions, please review the Frequently Asked Questions or contact the Fund for Gender Equality Secretariat.

http://www.unwomen.org/how-we-work/fund-for-gender-equality/

Following my passions

2011-10-14T20:24:00.000-07:00

This week has been about change. I'm not quite sure how it worked out this way but it is. I find this very interesting.

Let me give you a little background. Things have been a little bit spinny since school started. There was that period of time where I was too busy to post and dealing with too much crazy stuff in my life. Then I had a lull week last week where I should have been working on the stuff that is due in the next week (it's midterm week, I have so much due). But I knew that I needed to take a vacation from this all for my sanity. So I did.

This week, I have been absolutely slammed but not panicking and just working on things and rolling with the punches. I've also been extremely passionate.

My blog posts have reflected this passion and every day it seems I've had a new topic. I thought today I was going to have a nice little break to get my homework done, which for the most part I have been working on it. But, then it popped up in front of my eyes...today's passionate cause.

Invisible Children is something that I became passionate about my senior year of high school and while I have not stayed up to date on it, it's still something that I feel passionate about.

Please check out this article on what Obama is doing and educate yourself on this subject!!

http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/14/world/africa/africa-obama-troops/index.html?hpt=hp_t1
http://www.discoverthejourney.org/blog/?p=502
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vrva2aKW1lU

My top 13 ways of living at peace (with yourself, others and the world)

2011-10-14T00:34:00.000-07:00

1. Be passionate. Be involved. But be loving.
2. Plant a peace pole (i'm going to do this at my mom's!)
3. Random Acts of Kindness (RAK)
4. When you're driving and you think about that person making you angry...take a deep breath and smile because you are in control of you're safety.
5. Volunteer as much as possible
6. Laugh at everything
7. Love those that have opposite opinions from you
8. Compromise
9. Be self-aware
10. Think of the words you say and take into account their affect on people (racist, sexist, ageist, ableist, etc words)
11. Play with a child and teach him/her something as often as you can.
12. surround yourself with positive and loving people.
13. Be strong in your faith, whatever it may be.

~Ubuntu~

Love your Political Opposite

2011-10-13T22:04:00.000-07:00

In light of all of the politics my heart has been feeling, I wanted to post a blog about love. In politics it's easy to get into a dichotomy and negative feelings between people with differing beliefs. This could be particularly upsetting when the person with differing beliefs is someone close to you. A lot of people choose not to discuss politics but I'm too passionate to remain silent and it is too much a part of people to deny. People may claim apathy but there will always be some subject that will rile them up.

The important part to remember while we're having these discussions, is that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and we should love each other anyway. You can't change how people feel, but you can give them the resources to enlighten them through facts. Do as much research as you can and try not to let your emotions get involved with politics.

Let me give you a scenario from today:

As you may or may not be aware of, today the House of Representative passed a bill that would deny an emergency abortion in life threatening situations. Regardless of my passionate views on this subject, I found myself faced with an upsetting situation. One of my dear friends is completely opposite of me and posted some things on Facebook that upset me because of her passionate opinion and (what I see, at least) as a lack of common sense or facts. Needless to say, I've taken a break from speaking to her until I cool my jets because I would hate to ruin our friendship over something like this.

What I'm trying to say is, while her opinion may have upset me, it doesn't change the way I feel about her. It's her opinion and I have my opinion but we have many other things in common and she is a wonderful person as a whole. Her beliefs and opinions stem from a very important part of her and, like my opinions and beliefs mean a lot to me, they mean the world to her.

So when you and a friend or someone comes into a disagreement with you, don't be angry with them or fight with them, merely love them for who they are and for having their conviction. :)

With this, perhaps we can find a middle ground and be a country united once again.

My personal Tumblr

2011-10-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

Hey guys! I seem to be on FIRE with the blogs lately. I've got a ton to d o but I'm just feeling so involved and passionate right now. Looks like all of that stress and stuff I was dealing with took a back burner (and is not trying to control my life right now!) There's another post tonight but in the mean-time I wanted to show you my tumblr. I post short little things on there more often and it's personal although there are stuff that i "feature" and "sticky note" that are WQ worthy!!

http://raetothewyn.tumblr.com/

Tell me what you think :)

Occupy Wall Street

2011-10-13T00:55:00.000-07:00

I jotted this down on Tumblr earlier in a combination of reblogs and my thoughts but, of course, I wanted them to be more organized here. I think there is a lesson to be learned from this on all sides. Let's say the WQ message is to fight for what you believe in, to work your hardest despite everything trying to bring you down and to always do it peacefully.

I haven’t really been following Occupy Wall Street because of the endless amounts of more personal and closer to home issues that overtook my life for a bit but now that I’m really researching on it, I’m starting to get MAD.

This picture was my instigator. When I saw it this morning I just felt all crazy-like inside. This person may not be part of the 99% but much of the 99% does not HAVE the opportunity or the choice to be anything but part of that 99%. Also, where is this person if they aren’t part of the 99% of people who are not rich?
I’m not saying that this photograph is a lie, though I do not believe that it is the whole story. What I am saying though, is that this person’s situation is rare. Take how hard I’ve worked, my above decent GPA and the amount of things I do in my life (work, intern, freelance, school, homework, volunteer, breathe, blog, start a movement, etc) as an example. I may have received scholarships but that did not save me from debt. Life happens. This person might live in a rock if it hasn’t happened to them.
Nevertheless, people across America are frustrated with the economy and the way our politics are run. Hell, they’re probably fed up with our judicial system too. The US needs to recognize these issues and address them or there will be a coup in some way. We like our freedoms too much. Also, I want to applaud the occupiers on their nonviolent act and going through the proper channels (permits, etc).

This is a reblog:

While participants in Occupy Boston have done nothing more than sit around for the past week in attempt to promote open discourse about a set of reasonable ideas, two dozen New England Patriots helped build a playground in Providence today.
This is a reminder that talk is cheap, but action speaks. And sitting is a passive verb. If you love your country, go out and DO things to make it better - don’t spend your time sitting around in what’s grown into an unorganized mess that has lost sight of its original ideas.
Imagine if all those protesters had channeled all that time and energy into productivity - cleaning up our city, volunteering at local soup kitchens, helping educate children. Anybody can hold up a sign and pout. It takes a real commitment to make a statement.
- Stache

And lastly, for more information on Occupy Wall Street read up on it via the news sources. There's plenty of information just make sure it's unbiased when you're getting your facts so you can form your own opinion. Here's a photo slide show from the NYT. :)

Selena Gomez & The Scene - Who Says

2011-10-12T14:29:00.000-07:00

SAVE THE VAGINAS!

2011-10-11T18:40:00.000-07:00

October is breast cancer awareness month and everywhere people are declaring SAVE THE TATAS and I <3 Boobies! How fantastic! Breast cancer awareness has become so mainstreamed that we pronounce our love of boobies daily (especially boys...those dirty dirty men).

I applaud everyone for this. HUZZAH HUZZAH! Ladies, mammograms and self-breast exams are SO important. The founders of the I <3 Boobies movement did something amazing and took this taboo subject and made it conversation safe - better yet they made it IMPORTANT for conversations.

And now, I feel like, in addition, we should move to the next taboo, yet cancer inflicted subject. That's right ladies, your cervix.

Now we can mainstream this with "I <3 Vajayjay" bracelets but that's probably going to stay a little too taboo. Can you imagine Meg Whitman or Sarah Palin with one of those bracelets on? But maybe we can come up with an approach that's less "vulgar" by their standards. Because, they have cervixes, too. This is not a problem that we should just sweep under the rugs because it means we (gasp) have to talk about sexual safety and health.

HPV is NOT funny. Nor is cervical cancer.

So how, you may ask, can we save ourselves from it?

Yes, it is very important to get the HPV vaccine - I got mine in 2007. But HPV is not the only thing that causes cervical cancer and, like all vaccines, it is not 100% effective.

LADIES WE NEED TO PROTECT OURSELVES AGAINST STDs! (i prefer d over i, it just sounds better. an STi is a car to me...)

We all need to work on this; myself included. Condoms. Get them. They're cheap but if you don;t want to buy them make the boys buy them. Go to Planned Parenthood and get some. Ask a friend. Ask me. There is nothing more important than protecting ourselves.

Let me tell you about a little scare I had two years ago, without any fault of my own.

From 20-21 I was sure I had cervical cancer. Never mind the fact that I had gotten the HPV vaccine over 2 years before and took precautions to protect myself. My gyno scared me.

Let me background with the fact that your immune system does not fully develop until you are 21. On women, this affects cervical health.

So in summer 2009 I went to the gyno for my annual check up. And was devastated to find out a few weeks later that my cells were abnormal and pre-cancerous. From that point on I was told I would have to return to the doctors every 3 months for a painful procedure called a colposcopy. Gyno's do this to catch cervical cancer early so you can fight it by removing the cancerous cells. This enables women to be pregnant and carry a fetus full term.
As fate would have it, shortly after my 21st I found out my abnormal cells disappeared with my updated immune system. And that I was fine. I did not have HPV. I did not have cervical cancer. The thing is, I'm not alone. I know several other women like me who went through this scary process.

So because of this I promote health and safety for my cervix. I go to Planned Parenthood often.

I LOVE MY VAJAYJAY!!

Do you love yours?

Your Voice

2011-10-10T22:21:00.000-07:00

Have you used your voice lately?
No, I don't mean have you spoken to anyone and literally heard your voice. I mean have you used your VOICE? Have you spoken from the depths of your soul? Have you done something that you believe in? Have you done something to promote positive CHANGE?

Because let's face it, there's always something that needs to be changed. We were not designed to be content in our lives - we're curious, we're learning every day, and we should constantly be working to make this planet - this gift that we've been given of life - to make it the best it can be.

Change does not have to be something big. As my favorite movie character says: "You can't change the world but you can make a dent." - Sheldon Mopes (Death to Smoochy).

When's the last time you smiled at a stranger? Do it. Hug someone. Do something positive for yourself - because when you do something positive for yourself -- your positive energy is contagious.

LOVE with every ounce of your being. SCREAM it at the top of your lungs.

Use your voice to make a difference.

Rain drops wash it away

2011-10-05T12:49:00.000-07:00

Hello my little WQs,

I am so sorry I've been away for so long. Let me just tell ya...the last few weeks have been anything but calm. They've been exciting, anxious, busy, drama, pricey, hot, sticky and we could even throw in scary. In short, I've been wanting to write but I've never had the time or the emotional energy to do so.

Today, however, I'm feeling feisty on my lunch break at my internship. (Did I tell you I have an internship now? That's the busy part of the equation - work, school, intern, homework, repeat).

It's raining outside and I feel like that's just a breath of relief washing away the bad of the past few weeks. I'm usually a sunshiney girl but after all of that drama under the sun, I could use a little weather change. So here we are. Rainy days for new chances.

But before I get into the new chances bit, I'd like to post a few things that I've thought about writing about for the past few weeks.

1. I don't know if I've ever told you how important it is to get checked for STDs and pregnancy often. It's VERY important.
2. Always have money in your savings and a way of borrowing more in case your truck jumps off a cliff
3. A good support system of friends is THE BEST
4. Check out the website Emotional Baggage it's wayyy cool
5. You don't have to tell me what's wrong, we can sit in silence together.
6. New Girl is an AWESOME new TV show. She's also me.
7. Cleaning your room cleans your head
8. StumbleUpon is SO bad when you're in school
9. Public Safety apps are on the rise -- google some like Advanced 911
10. Did you know that kids as young as 1 are using iPads?
11. Volunteering is good for your soul
12. When it rains, it pours but, as Andy Grammar says, only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again
13. Sometimes you're just on two different pages, but everyone reads at different speeds so you'll get there eventually. :)

Alright, now what is this business about washing things away?
I think rainy days are the perfect days for self-reflection and to make positive changes in your life!

Sit down, do it. Listen to some good music while you're thinking it out and relax :)

LIGHTS ventures into Siberia – unknown territory

2011-10-03T15:25:00.000-07:00

Check out my latest music review for Hollywood Music Magazine!!

LIGHTS ventures into Siberia – unknown territory

For the sake of fun

2011-09-29T10:07:00.000-07:00

Get your weekly dose of Debbie Puente's Friendship column! She always seems to write just what I've been thinking about. I'll post an update soon; things are a little overwhelming over here.

For the sake of fun

Be strong my warrior queens <3

Strength in a Storm

2011-09-16T17:31:00.000-07:00

For the entirety of my life, my parents could not have stressed the importance of family and friends any more than they always have. Somehow, throughout the last couple of years, I had forgotten the strength and meaning of the word: family.

Well yes, I recognize that I have been close to nonexistent with my posts here, but I will tell you that I have not forgotten about all of you. To put in lighter terms, I have been treading through what seems like every storm possible lately.

Through these storms, I have had the privilege to truly feel the presence of a grand, irreplaceable support system of family and friends. My sister and I are 5 years apart and despite that difference in years, I am fortunate to say that my sister is one of the best friends I could ever have. Interestingly, before knowing of my recent struggles, she gave me a gift that came along with these words:

"love... The greatest virtue of all. Love warms the existence of mankind and elevates the spirit."

It was as if she knew without knowing. At such a tumultuous moment in my life, I know that I could count on her, my family, and friends to help bring me to brighter days in times to come.

So now I would like to ask you: What does family represent for you? Where do you go or who do you go to when you've found you've lost your strength? What does the power of love mean to you?

sorry!!

2011-09-08T22:11:00.000-07:00

Hey guys! I just wanted to apologize for my disappearance! I've been pretty crazy busy with school this week - as soon as my homework is done there will be like 50 posts!!
Have a great week!
Raewyn

RX: Eat chocolate, drink red wine, and spend time with friends

2011-09-04T12:21:00.000-07:00

I just absolutely adore this column...learn a little bit about the healthy things for us that everyone says is unhealthy! (like chocolate!)

RX: Eat chocolate, drink red wine, and spend time with friends

I Get By With a Little From My Friends

2011-09-01T19:40:00.000-07:00

Today, I am sick. My throat hurts and I've basically been miserable all day. It's really not fun at all. But did reaffirm how absolutely amazing my best friends / roommates are.

As I was sitting on the couch basically dying (or so it feels), my roommate came home and made me lunch. I was absolutely thrilled. As if that wasn't enough, two of them then left to go look at mattresses and brought me home a bouquet of my favorite flowers to cheer me up.

I LOVE THESE GIRLS.

It brings me back to the Sex and the City quote: "Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with."

It's true. Have you heard of Vitamin F? I know I alluded to it the other day with the Spa relaxation and girl time post. But here's one of those forwarded emails about girls...I just don't think I could ever stress the importance of girlfriends enough, so I'll keep saying it...Enjoy!

"I just finished taking an evening class at Stanford. The last lecture was on the mind-body connection-the relationship between stress and disease. The speaker (head of psychiatry at Stanford) said, among other things, that one of the best things that a man could do for his health is to be married to a woman whereas for a woman, one of the best things she could do for her health was to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends. At first everyone laughed, but he was serious.

Women connect with each other differently and provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. Physically this quality “girlfriend time" helps us to create more serotonin-a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of well being. Women share feelings whereas men often form relationships around activities. They rarely sit down with a buddy and talk about how they feel about certain things or how their personal lives are going. Jobs? Yes. Sports? Yes. Cars? Yes. Fishing, hunting, golf? Yes. But their feelings?-rarely.

Women do it all of the time. We share from our souls with our sisters/mothers, and evidently that is very good for our health. He said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as jogging or working out at a gym. There's a tendency to think that when we are "exercising" we are doing something good for our bodies, but when we are hanging out with friends, we are wasting our time and should be more productively engaged--not true. In fact, he said that failure to create and maintain quality personal relationships with other humans is as dangerous to our physical health as smoking!

So every time you hang out to schmooze with a gal pal, just pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for doing something good for your health! We are indeed very, very lucky. Sooooo. let's toast to our friendship with our girlfriends. Evidently it's very good for our health."

Opportunities

2011-08-31T21:19:00.000-07:00

Audrey Hepburn once said: "Opportunities don't often come along. So, when they do, you have to grab them."

These words could not be more true in my life right now, and, though you may not see it, In yours too.

I'm a firm believer that every day we are faced with an opportunity in some aspect of our lives. It could be the opportunity to meet someone new and make a new friend. Or like for me tomorrow, an opportunity to get an internship at a magazine.

So as I sit here scanning the website of the magazine to make the most of the interview, I realize I'm completely unprepared. I've done countless job interviews but never one for a magazine.

Yet here's the opportunity. I have to seize it. I can't let my doubts or fears stop me from doing my best and thinking that I have it in the bag. Let's be honest, there's probably a chance that I could get the internship. They obviously liked my resume enough to set up an interview. Points for me. As far as how the interview goes? That's all up to me and my attitude.

You see, in interviews, your answers to the questions are only 50% of what they're looking for. Personality and attitude is the other half. So if you go in with a positive attitude that I've got this then chances are, you probably have it.

Now, I'm not going to go in feeling like they're lucky if they pick me and if not it's their loss. On the contrary, this is a learning experience. They could love me or they could hate me but either way I've learned something for the next time and I've taken the opportunities life is handing to me.

As humans we waste too much time being scared of our opportunities. We're scared of failure, when in truth, failure is the only thing that keeps us trying harder.

So take every opportunity you're faced with, why live your life any other way?

Overheard on Campus

2011-08-30T17:34:00.000-07:00

I have a problem with eavesdropping. I love listening to conversations and even butting in. I can't help it! I'm a journalist - my curiosity is insatiable, especially for information.

Today at school, I had a 7 and a half hour break (horrible, I know) and found myself eavesdropping more than usual. The topic of every conversation seemed to be Jay-Z and Beyonce's fetus. I first heard of it in class yesterday (apparently it was announced at the VMAs) and then again on the radio this morning. Obviously, everyone's talking about it and the surrounding circumstances.

All I can think of is WHO CARES!!!?!

Don't get me wrong, pregnancy is a very beautiful thing. But why does a celebrity's pregnancy mean so much more than a nobody's?

Again, I'm part of the media. But the realities and focus of the media really angers me. The story is not in the celebrities.

The real story lies in the family that lives down the street with the son who's away at war or your boyfriend's sister's life as a single mom with an autistic child. The true stories are the ones not being told.

We each have a story.

Instead of focusing on these over-dramatized lives, let's ask each other to hear our stories.

What's yours?

Friendship and Stress :)

2011-08-30T00:04:00.000-07:00

Wasn't I just talking about this?

My coworker's mom is a columnist for The Examiner and she's a lady after my own heart. Tonight's blogpost is courtesy of her column. Enjoy!!

http://www.examiner.com/female-friendship-in-national/make-sure-to-take-your-friendship-meds

-Raewyn

This is your life

2011-08-25T21:48:00.001-07:00

This poster is sold on http://shop.holstee.com/collections/designed-x-holstee/products/holstee-manifesto-poster

Spa Night

2011-08-25T16:50:00.000-07:00

I know all of the time I talk about pampering yourself when you're in a funk -- manicures, pedicures, retail therapy etc. It's something I could swear by because you're giving yourself positive attention that you need to destress.

On Tuesday, I was enlightened to an even better way of pampering yourself. Yeah, all of that stuff is amazing and relieves some tension temporarily, but the ability to truly de-stress through a spa / girl's night vastly surpasses a simple manicure or pedicure.

I don't know if I've mentioned it, but my roommates and I have been in a little bit of a funk for part of this summer. We were all kind of "ehh" on Tuesday, but luckily we were hosting a spa party. Spa parties are similar to Cookie Lee events. Someone hosts it and a professional will come in with products and test them out on you and show them off and then you can decide to purchase some after.

We started off the evening with cheese and crackers, fruits and veggies, and a nice pitcher of Sangria (we're all over 21, but refreshing iced tea works if you're younger too!) Once our professional arrived (she's a close friend of my roommate) we moved into the living room and she gave us various mini spa treatments. We had miniature facials, lip facials, hand and feet scrubs / moisturizers.

All of this was absolutely phenomenal and can help peel of tons of stress and toxins from our bodies. To top it all off, the estrogen was flowing and our endorphins were high. Women release the hormone oxytocin when they are together bonding and it's a "feel good" hormone.

It is a beyond amazing experience. I suggest trying it. And next time you're feeling sad, surround yourself with your best girlfriends because your oxytocin's gonna brighten things up quicker than you think :)

**Our spa party was hosted by a representative of BeautiControl

Tattoos

2011-08-23T10:58:00.000-07:00

What are your thoughts on tattoos?

Personally, I think they're a particularly awesome way of expressing yourself, especially if it's something personal. Tattoos are there forever. So it better be meaningful.

On Sunday, my little brother turned 18 and we had a tattoo party in celebration. My dad, brother, roommate and I all got tattoos that meant something to us.

My brother and I got tattoos for our cousin Gregory who died after having cancer when he was a child. It was an incredibly beautiful moment of us getting our tattoos. Here's some pix!

Raewyn

Confidence for All

2011-08-21T13:52:00.000-07:00

Hey guys,

So I'm very lucky that my friends posted blogs this week because I was in Vegas living up the good life (or relaxing by the pool to be more accurate). Sitting in Vegas, I got a good look at appearances and insecurities because that's what Vegas is built on.

Of course we have the girls faked to the extreme and the buildings are all glitz and glamour until you get off the strip and realize it's just another desert town. The part that actually struck me, was the high amount of faked up insecure guys.

I thought this would go perfectly with the previous post about girls and confidence, because it's important for us to remember that most guys lack confidence too. It's how our society breaks us down and how it makes money off of us.

Walking around the pool there were so many guys built to the extreme, strutting their stuff and trying to woo any girl they could. Just by glimpsing these guys, immediately you're gonna think they're cocky and have a lot of confidence, nothing can bring them down.

Not true.

Girls spend hours getting their hair and nails done, putting on makeup, shopping etc. Boys? They spend hours at the gym.

So whenever we're feeling insecure about ourselves, we should probably think that everyone else feels insecure too.

Let's all build our confidence up, shall we?

The Warrior of Warrior Queen

2011-08-18T10:38:00.000-07:00

Dear ladies of Warrior Queen,
If you have been following us for a little while you are aware, or possibly not, that there is a Warrior (or warrior king) helping with the warrior queen. I will remain nameless, but for those of you who do not know me, lets call me Jason. I am a guy, I have simple ideas and I believe firmly in the mission statement of Warrior Queen (in fact I helped write it).

I have been lucky enough to have been surrounded by women who are confident, or so I thought, throughout my entire life. It has taken me almost 20 years to learn a few things about “confident” women. First off, there are two different types of confident women. There are women who are confident in themselves and there are women who have confidence given to them by the outside world. WELL I am here to tell you, the more confident you are in the beauty that you have, the more beautiful you become. Have you ever known someone who at first did not seem that attractive to you, but the more you got to know them the more attractive they became?

On the opposite side of that I have a close friend who is not confident in herself. She cannot see that she is beautiful, no matter how many people tell her, and as harsh as it may be it almost makes her less attractive to the actually good class of men. And yes, I promise that there are a better class of men than the lying, cheating, D***** bags that most of you seem to surround yourselves with. I am not saying that we are easy to find, nor am I saying that we are perfect in any way. But those of us that like to think of ourselves, as the “good guys” want a girl who is confident. The problem that my friend has is that, she is seen as an easier target for the guys who are less than adequate. She embodies what they go for, a girl who does not believe in herself, who is not confident enough to know that she can find someone else. My friend stayed in a horrible relationship for way too long, she will give a million reasons for it, but the truth was she got comfortable, and she wasn’t confident enough in herself to believe that someone else would come along and make her happier than she ever knew possible.

The thing, at least for me, is not if a girl is the next super model, or the “hottest” girl at the party, it is what she perceives herself to be. I am not going to lie to you; one of my longest relationships was with a girl who, though incredibly beautiful to me, was not someone who would cause you to stare if you walked by. But to me, she was the most beautiful girl in the world. She was the girl who could smile at me, and melt my heart. And EVERY GIRL reading this right now deserves that.. Every girl deserves to be with a guy who wakes up every morning thanking his lucky stars that he found you. Because it does not matter if you are perfect, it matters that you know that you are worth it. Most of the guys that girls say they want, want a girl who is not only happy with who she is, but knows who she is and embraces it.

My sister is the perfect example of this. She knows (or thinks) that she is not the most beautiful girl, and that she is a little nerdy, but she embraces it with all of her heart. She knows that there is going to be a guy out there that is going to love the fact that she is a person who would rather spend a night sipping tea and reading a book than going to a club and partying it up.

And every girl reading this right now, can learn something from that.

Joe Nichols has a song called gimme that girl. It is a favorite of mine for many reasons. The main reason is that the lyrics speak towards what I personally, want and look for in a girl. “Gimme a girl that's beautiful Without a trace of makeup on Barefoot in the kitchen, singing her favorite song Dancin' aroun' like a fool Starin' in her own little show Gimme the girl that the rest of the world ain't lucky enough to know.”

Now NOT ONLY is this what I look for in a girl, but girls, you need to start looking for a guy who sees all of these things in you. There are countless songs about being who you are and that being beautiful. Every girl reading this should know that someone is going to see you for what you are. I am going to leave you now with these words from Jaron and the Long Road Home, in their song You’re Beautiful.

Babe, you coulda gone with RomeoBut you let him go And you stayed with me instead And every day I find new ways that make you beautifulYou're beautiful and thats beautifulWhat's she doing with a guy like me?You're so cool and I'm high tea.I don't deserve toHave a girl as beautiful as you

Why?

2011-08-17T14:28:00.000-07:00

Hello friends!

I'm sorry, once again, I went missing. But! I'm still here. Anyway I'd like to share a thought with you, an experience I had today.

Recently, this question has crossed my mind various times, as I'm sure it has yours also:

Why?

We may ask on terms of pure curiosity, amusement and/or in search for an answer in relation to the things that happen in life. It's perfectly normal too, to ask the question. We've been doing it ever since we were young.

I am a server at The Lazydog Cafe and I helped a wonderful couple today. They were fun to talk to. They told me about their dog that they have been training to become a service dog for Alzheimer's patients for the past 4 years. They rescued him from the pound, as he was an abused dog. Interestingly, they told me that the dog tends to have a bad reaction to certain people. Why? It's very likely that this dog has developed a barrier against people that remind him of the days he was abused.

As a result, the couple told me that the dog has come a long way since they first took him in. It made me happy to see and hear how proud they were of this dog. Yet, I couldn't help but ask, Why? Why do people think it's okay to abuse of animals in such ways?

Sadly, I may not ever know the answer to this. It's more than likely that no one will. Yet, not having the answer didn't stop this couple from trying to turn this situation around. What I'm getting at here is that, there are some questions we will never be able to know the answer to and others that we will. Whichever the one, we should try to find a way to turn our why into how. How can I change this situation for the better? It's important to remember though that it's also important to recognize when we have the power to change a situation or not. However, this couple is a great example of the former. No one asked them to do what they have done for this dog and the patients he will soon be able to help.

It warmed my heart to know: that the good in people still exists, that there are plenty of people that don't think it's okay to abuse of animals, and most importantly that there are ways to change the bad for good.

So now I ask you, how can (and will) you try to turn a situation around?

Dream Big!

2011-08-16T11:38:00.000-07:00

I saw this picture today and it totally inspired me to write a blog. As I was about to sit down and write it, my friend who just left to pursue his dream of playing in the NFL started talking to me on Facebook. When you dream, dream big, right?

Let me tell you a little bit about Tyler Williams: he's 20 and he played football throughout high school and community college. This past school year he got the opportunity to go to not one, but several schools to play football. Many of these schools offered him a scholarship. He finally settled on St. Anselm in New Hampshire and left last week to start training for football season.

This kid is such an inspiration. Everyday he does what he can to follow his dream - whether it's working out to stay in shape or if it's some positive thinking. I worked with Tyler for the past six months and there wasn't a day that he came in and wasn't exuding positivity.

Try it out. Follow your dreams. Turn your dreams into SOMETHING. If you don't have a dream yet, sit down and really think about what it is you love. It could be born out of nothing; I didn't realize my dream until senior year of high school, but looking back...it was there the whole time.

Have a wonderful day. And Tyler, thank you for being an inspiration and a great friend.

Lovestrong

2011-08-13T11:06:00.000-07:00

Hey guys,
Sorry I've been MIA. I went on a crazy concert extravaganza this past week all across SoCal and I'm still in recovery mode. I wanted to share this video with you. I'm sure many of you have heard this song or seen the music video. But think of it from a WQ standpoint.

I saw Christina Perri in Los Angeles on Thursday and her intro from this song was along the lines of finally figuring out what she deserves. She had a WQ moment. She calls it lovestrong, which is also the name of the album.

She's amazing. This song's amazing. Always be inspired.

Demi Lovato

2011-08-07T10:29:00.000-07:00

Has anyone been following Demi Lovato's struggles. Unlike many celebrities who put their problems on display (drug use, duis, rehab, etc) but don't fix them, Demi took her problems and tries to help those struggling too.

Demi started out as a Disney starlet, like Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, and so many more. Instead of abandoning her young fans when she moved into the music scene she has embraced them. Especially, because she's dealing with an issue that starts with pre-teens. For those of you who don't know what she's been going through - Demi has opened up about bulemia, cutting, and her diagnosis with bipolar disorder. She publicly works to help others struggling and her new song is one of amazing strength. Today, I'm honoring her for being a warrior queen -- the best of herself in spite of her struggles and for taking her struggles and using her celebrity status to help others with them.

Follow her @ddlovato she writes some pretty inspiring tweets
-Raewyn

Be a Queen

2011-08-05T17:09:00.000-07:00

"Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another steppingstone to greatness."
-Oprah

I saw this quote on Twitter and it screamed blog post. Why shouldn't we think like we are queens?
We are queens after all -- warrior queens.

Warrior queens think the best of themselves: they're brave and they're not afraid to fail. If I fail, if my creation of a magazine fails -- so what. Warrior Queens have STILL made a difference on an individual level. By helping one person, we're helping the world.

Failure is a scary concept. It seems to be the opposite of success. We all want to succeed right? So the opposite of success is the opposite of what we want. Sometimes it's easy to think this:

If I fail at this, then I have wasted my time and have nothing to show for it.

Let's get away from this negative thought process. Especially because this is not true. AT ALL. It's not a waste of time because there's a lesson in it -- there's someone who's going to see the effort you put into it. Determination. Passion. There's so much more that can be found in failure.

As Oprah said -- it's just a steppingstone.

TLC for Me

2011-08-03T09:52:00.000-07:00

I know I've posted about this before but I think we all need a little reminder about personal TLC. :)

For the past few weeks my roommates and I have been on a little bit of an emotional roller coaster (without realizing it). We're all having a little bit of drama and it's really stressing us out. Of course we're there for each other but you can't really feel better until you give yourself some TLC.

On Saturday, I was sad pretty much all day. I sat on the couch and slept, and I never do things like that. I'm usually the girl running around happy trying to cheer everyone up. But my happy meter was a little too low that day. Of course my friends ended up kidnapping me and taking me to do the smallest little things (entertaining dinner, night hike on the beach to look at the stars and have an adventure) and my night was absolutely amazing.

So on Sunday, after I had gotten a little bit out of my funk I remembered that the state of your bedroom is representative of your state of mind. OH BOY. My room was a complete disaster...and I'm basically always a hot mess. So I cleaned. It's clean now and I feel sooo much more organized and comfortable.

The next step on my TLC? Retail Therapy!!!
Now that was fun, and drained my bank account. But definitely worth it. There's nothing like making yourself feel great when you're down in the dumps!

Other proven methods that work:
Gym time (endorphins!!)
serene walks on the beach
mani/pedis
making art
church
journaling
rocking out to music...

What are your favorite ways to pamper yourself when you're feeling less than 100% you?
-Raewyn

Giving

2011-07-31T10:50:00.001-07:00

Hii! I'm sorry I've been MIA for quite some time, but in the meantime I'd like to leave you with something my mom has always instilled in me:

It's always better to give than to receive.

It doesn't mean let yourself be taken advantage of, but simply that you shouldn't expect to be handed everything. Rather, give what you can because it's always going to be the best you have. There's no better prize, reward, or gift than that.

Daniela

Tweet Tweet

2011-07-30T22:35:00.003-07:00

Found this on twitter -- I felt inspired -- have a great Sunday!!

"By being yourself, you put something wonderful in the world that was not there before." - Edwin Elliot

Innocence

2011-07-29T21:46:00.000-07:00

This past week I've been hanging out with a few 10 year olds. On Saturday I saw my cousin and yesterday I hung out with my "little sister." These two little girls are very different in almost every sense of the word. One's athletic and active; the other prefers to stay at home with her family. They're pre-teens and soon they'll be reaching puberty. As of now, they're still not interested in boys or makeup or nail polish except that it looks cool. They don't NEED this stuff like girls in high school and women need it. "I won't go anywhere without make up on" is a commonly heard phrase.

What I'm trying to say is...they're innocent...and I like it.

My little sis told me yesterday that the boys at school say she's a tough girl because most of the girls are really girly and prissy. She likes to ride horses and doesn't mind getting dirty. She's a little bit like me -- outspoken, opinionated, and is a "tough girl." But every time I go over to her house she plays with my hair or paints my nails and we do these "girly" things. My cousin is similar. She's shy but she likes to do things her way. "Who would ever want a boyfriend?!" is something she commonly asks me.

These little girls have something that I wish most girls continued to have throughout their lives -- the courage to be who they are. They don't know who else to be at this point -- they don't have boys and other girls telling them to be a certain way to be "cool." They're just them.

But of course, they're still insecure about some thing on their bodies, because that's what society tells us we should be. I feel for these two little 10 year olds. Once they reach middle school they don't stand much of a chance...none of us did, and few remain themselves. I guess that's how I want this to trickle down into the younger generation. You CAN be yourself and do all of the things you've always loved and still fit in.

She didn't have to change or prove anything to anyone:

I Statements

2011-07-28T13:45:00.000-07:00

Hey Guys! This is Molly, I’m one of the writers. I have been with the Warrior Queen movement since Raewyn started to form it. The concept surprised me and inspired me then. Now without even realizing it the warrior queen definition runs through my head all day long. The movement is one that definitely builds women up and makes us stronger, more confident, worldly women. So here is my first blog post:

I Statement

I'm wondering if we counted how many “I statements” we said each day what would be the total: the hundreds, thousands, millions...could we even count that high? We live in a world that is so focused on ourselves. We complain about how the world is treating us. Stop complaining and face what is in front of you; handle and deal with it. Why do we complain about things that do not affect us and act like a victim? Like it was inflicted upon us and we are blameless. “My test was so hard” - if we studied harder, it would not have been. We try to remain blameless in situations where we are to blame. “She’s so mean to me.” When it actuality we let them be mean. In addition, we take offense because we feel entitled. We are entitled to nothing. We deserve nothing but receive everything. I am complaining about complainers. Complaining is used to draw attention to one’s self. I need to learn to sit back and enjoy life and everything about it. Trashing another person does nothing but boast. If it’s not hurting us why does it matter that: her mom does her homework or she took modeling photos. We complain so much in this world. I am sick of it and I do it so much. Praise each other for the little accomplishment. In conversations listen to others points of views and wait to add in your two cents. Don’t sit there contemplating what you are going to say next. I am sassy and I noticed it a lot this summer. I saw that almost every statement I said to certain people was almost always sarcastic and nasty. Why? Because I wanted to take out how I felt about my situation on them. Sarcasm is used to bring attention to myself and how witty I am at the expense of someone else. In a world that is trying to change for better; how can we change when we are all so focused on ourselves instead of each other. I am not saying we need a collective society focused on the betterment of the whole; but rather we need to stop trying to make ourselves look better and focus on the world around us.

Confidence, use it.

2011-07-26T21:01:00.000-07:00

The other day I (Katy) was chatting with Raewyn, expressing my feelings about how confidence has made a huge impact on my life recently and she kindly asked me to write about it for her blog! So here I am to express my opinion on confidence! :)

Confidence, everyone has it, but not everyone uses it. I’m pretty sure if you were to ask any male (over the age of 18) what the sexiest thing a girl could possibly wear is, he’d answer confidence. That is however after he jokingly states “nothing.” The power of confidence is completely overlooked. Confidence is what gives us power, it makes us “warrior queens.” It gives us the ability to overcome fears, stand a little bit taller, and gives us the ability to walk into a room full of girls and not feel inferior. It also allows us to stand in the buff in front of a boy and actually enjoy ourselves instead of worrying about what he’s thinking about our bodies. Confidence has to be one of the most powerful tools a girl can have, we just need to know how to use it. Eleanor Roosevelt said it best when she said, “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.” So why are we not using it? Why do we let others make us feel inferior? I can speak from personal experience when I say that confidence is amazing, it has allowed me to enjoy life without worrying what others are thinking, and do you know how amazing that feeling is? How do we gain confidence? We need to embrace who we are, stop looking at ourselves in the mirror picking out what’s wrong with our bodies, and instead think about how amazing our bodies, you are YOU, that’s what makes you special. Perhaps you don’t have legs for days like Cameron Diaz, but your smile is probably brighter than the sun. We are more than what meets the eye, beauty is but only skin deep. Confidence allows our personalities to shine, and gives us the oomph to stand a bit taller and do things we once were too “afraid” to do, such as call a boy first, wear a specific outfit you thought you “couldn’t pull off” or apply for a specific job you didn’t think you could get. Confidence goes hand in hand with positive thinking. If you think you’re amazing, you are, others will pick up on it and believe it too.

So my little warrior queens, let me remind you how beautiful you are, no matter what anyone else says. Stand tall, feel beautiful and use that powerful tool inside you called confidence to take charge of your own life. :)

<3 Katy

2011-07-25T09:44:00.000-07:00

I know it's been a few days since a blog post -- us writers have been a little busy between summer vacations and summer school (finals and midterms -________-)

We'll try to post something today, but definitely tomorrow.

Here's a little quote to get you through:

A small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. -Margaret Mead

#bethechange

Positive attitudes and happiness

2011-07-21T09:08:00.000-07:00

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realise they were the big things." - Robert Brault

I know I've said it before and I will say it everyday until the day I die:

Positivity begets positive change.

If you are positive, confident, happy, etc then positive things are going to continue happening. Of course there will be moments when bad things happen. Bad things happen to everyone, but when faced with a positive attitude they suddenly become so much easier to deal with.

I have three reasons why everyone should be happy:

1) you are alive

2) you will never be alone, even if you feel it
3) tomorrow is always a new day

Last time I checked that each and every one of us breathing is alive. The beauty about being alive is the other two: there is always the opportunity for things to get better; always an opportunity for things to look up.

So why not try to be happy? Why waste your time with negative outlooks that drag you down and closes your mind and literally blocks out the chance to be happy?

Whenever I have a bad day I like to get my anger or sadness out via the gym or crying and then to take a nice shower. When I'm in the shower I think to myself, I'm washing off all of that negativity. The next part of my day's gonna be so much fun. Why? Because there's something beautiful out there. Someone's going to be smiling and it's going to be contagious.

Have a great day :)

Raewyn

Friendship

2011-07-20T10:08:00.000-07:00

Friendship is the one thing that can get anyone through anything. The best part about that? You get to choose your friends. Family is supportive and amazing and can be there for you through thick and thin, but sometimes they're just too close for comfort.

But with friends, they're there for you when you need them. Luckily, there's always someone waiting to be a friend. Even if a friend is failing at everything friendship stands for, you can't be alone. There's someone else out there to befriend. There's so many people in the world just looking for a good friend. Want to get a good friend? Be a good friend :)

I have the best friends. I don't mean like I have best friends, I do. But my friends are literally the best they can be for me. Yes, I have friend fights and sometimes we aren't on the same page. But there is always someone that is willing to listen, someone worrying, and someone (many someones) willing to help me follow my dreams of this movement.

Last night, you met Daniela. She's one of our new writers for the movement and I can't begin to describe how much I love and adore her and the others that will be posting and promoting soon. Last year, I moved to an area where I only knew a handful of people. I got a job, and somehow in that mix made this amazing network of friends. So I wanted to say thank you.

Thank you friends for being there for me on the nights that I'm crying, the nights that I'm laughing, the nights where we're just sitting watching TV. These moments mean the world to me. Mostly, thank you for helping me achieve my dream.

If you ever feel alone and like you don't have a friend, email me. I'm more than happy to be a friend and to share my friends. TWLOHA offers support too :)

Have a great day,
Raewyn

"Worthy Enough"

2011-07-19T20:16:00.000-07:00

Hi friends!

As Raewyn has mentioned, there are changes going on in order to get the ball rolling on this Warrior Queen movement! With that said, I find it best fit to introduce myself as one of the new writers. My name is Daniela and I've joined the team with great confidence in what it stands for:

"strong individuals, filled with self-confidence and realize not only the potential they have, but the potential in every girl out there to overcome the harsh eye society has put on being a girl."

However, to be quite honest, I've been nervous all day about posting something for the first time. Tossing back and forth ideas in my brain of what to talk to you all about. Nothing seemed worthy enough. And of course, when that happened- I realized what was wrong.

Sometimes, when we're in constant search of the perfect idea, moment, or something "worthy enough" we forget to just appreciate and enjoy what the present holds.

So I'll leave you with what I've learned for the day:

Live the moment, don't live for it.

Talk to you soon,

Daniela

Just What You Need

2011-07-19T08:46:00.000-07:00

Isn't it funny when you're having an emotionally tumultuous day and every where something speaks to you telling you to "be stronger;" "hold through;" "follow your heart."

Yesterday was one of those days. You can go days and weeks having an amazing time just enjoying life, but at some point or another something's going to go wrong. Something's going to confuse you. Something's going to get in your way. What's the point of life, if not?

What I find funny -- coincidental, sent by God, serendipity, whichever you believe in -- is that life will present you with these things.

Song lyrics. Quotes. Conversations with people. A new friend with exactly what you need (emotionally, physically, etc).

Basically, you're always going to have something to keep you fighting on.

Here's what I saw yesterday:

Songs:
Fighting for Nothing - Meg & Dia
I Can Do Better - Avril Lavigne
Release Me - Jack's Mannequin
Tweets:
All dreams come true if we have the courage to pursue them.Nothing is ever wrong. We learn from every step we take. Whatever you did today was the way it was meant to be. Be proud of you
Quotes:
"Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you." - Ralph Waldo Emerson"There is a future for you. The resistance encountered now predicates hope. Only as we rise do we encounter opposition." -Frederick Douglass
And perhaps the most inspiring that I found -- a new ring from Kohl's

Does this ever happen to you?

Have a great day --

Listen to this song

2011-07-19T00:41:00.000-07:00

Be inspired:

Do Something

2011-07-14T09:53:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been on the website, DoSomething.org?

Chances are, you have not. But let me tell you how cool it is. This site offers volunteer opportunities in almost any field you can imagine; the resources you need to start a club; and... *drum roll please* grants for your clubs you start up.

Each week this organization gives away 250 dollars in grants to start-up clubs as well as other grants and ways to win prizes. I found it on FastWeb.com and am attempting to use this to help with the warrior queen movement.

Even if the movement doesn't fit the criteria -- this website is still absolutely amazing. You know me, I'm always searching for volunteer opportunities and failing at finding them. This website offers exactly what I've been looking for.

Here are a few cool projects currently going on:

Drop Dead Gorgeous
Love is the New Black
Young Women in Real Life Situations
Finding the Fabulous
Ophelia's Voice

Check it out, and I'll post the club page and projects for WQ when I can :)

- Raewyn

Are you Ready For a Revamp?!

2011-07-12T09:02:00.000-07:00

Things are happening over here as the blog is about to become more than just a blog. That's right, it's time that Warrior Queen becomes a full-blown movement that's gonna spread around the nation. So let me give you a little preview of what's to come by August --
a) More writers and blog posts.
b) Grass Roots Movement :)

and in the time that follows:

c) products to sell to gain money to publish the magazine
d) tours to promo the crap out of it!!

Lemme know if you're interested in helping or if you have any questions, suggestions etc!!!

I'm excited. so you better be excited.

Letter of Encouragement

2011-07-11T09:50:00.000-07:00

So, in my volunteer work with TWLOHA I've decided to write a letter of encouragement and send to them. They send them to someone in need and it's completely anonymous. Of course, I wanted to share my letter and hope that you could do something like this too. Also, check out the website www.operationbeautiful.com :) It's fun!

Keep holding on :)
I like to find comfort in music when I'm feeling upset. There's something about the crescendos, beats, and lyrics that seem to remind me that I'm special.
The nice thing about music is that it's everywhere and there's something for everyone that will unlock those emotions and release the pain.
Life happens and it can be scary what it throws at you but I know we can get through it. We have each other and even when we don't know or realize it, we have love. Even if it's the love of someone we haven't yet met, it's still there. The potential for greatness is always there.
As someone with an anxiety disorder and prone to panic attacks, the unknown is scary. I want to be in control. But if i have complete control where is the beauty? I like to find beauty in the imperfections. If everything were perfect where would the individuality be?
Be yourself. That's my mantra. Even when I don't know who I am I sit in introspection and do what my heart says. Listen to your heart - so cliche, but so true.
In the words of Anna Nalick
"No one can find the rewind button so cradle your head in your hands and breathe, just breathe"
The truth is, I love you. Even though I don't know you. I know that I love you for the strength you have and the beauty that is you.

Have a beautiful day,

Birthday Epiphanies :)

2011-06-08T20:53:00.001-07:00

So, every year around my birthday I have an epiphany with my feelings for the year. It's really strange, most people make changes on New Years, but I make it on my birthday. Perhaps this is because for the better part of my life, my year starts and ends as the school calendar dictates; not to mention the obvious answer that it truly is when a new year begins for me.

I'll recap the past four years birthdays because those are the most important to me. When I turned 18, there was a sense of adventure and drama, which developed into anxiety. When I turned 19 I became single, and that set the tone for a year of rebuilding the warrior queen within. My 20th birthday was surrounded with anxiety and I spent the better part of that year wishing to be 25 and settled. (Quarter life crisis?) At 21, I decided -- fuck it! I'm 21, this is my year for fun and to shine and not let anyone bring me down. Every year, I mostly fulfill or carry that feeling from my birthday throughout until mid april or May.

This year's epiphany is a doozy...are you ready for it?

I'm grown up.

Let's break it down -- this year was supposed to be my graduation year and launching me into society as an adult. That's kind of a year behind schedule, but it hasn't kept me a kid longer. Tomorrow I move into my first apartment without any of my parents help. With MY good credit score, I got approved. I opened a bank account with my roomies. I won't need my parent's help paying for anything.

I own my own truck - the pink slip's in my name. Everythng I do is my responsibility. Student loans? All in my own name. The only reason I'm still my mom's dependent is to get healthcare - but that will drop off next year. I will have a career soon, I'll have to pay my student loans back in a year and a half. Soon I'll be thinking about buying a house, investments, gettina a new vehicle and retiring chuck to the desert (his rightful home where he and I can just play)

What an exciting thought. I'm a grown up. How scary. I'm solely responsible. I've done a lot of growing up in the past year and I didn't even notice. Perhaps that's why I've gotten into so many fights with friends. Maybe they've been static and I changed and thus opened my eyes to their immature ways.

And maybe, just maybe I now realize that getting married isn't something that's quite so far off. I mean, not for years, I'm still single. But I can't perach that we're too young anymorew because we're not.

So I'm gonna embrace growing up and be smart about it. I'm a planner. And now that I'm no longer living paycheck to paycheck it's time to start investing. I'm ready to rise to the top. And here comes a hard year of planning the magazine.

I'm ready to be an adult. I'm ready to reach for my dreams and watch them come true, are you?

Suicide Prevention

2011-06-02T13:11:00.000-07:00

Every year there's a week dedicated to Suicide Prevention, but as you've seen by my previous post TWLOHA is dedicated to suicide prevention on a daily basis. Shouldn't we all be? I know that I try my hardest to be there for my friends and even people I don't know. IMAlive is an instant messaging group under TWLOHA that offers support via instant messaging. Last Suicide Prevention week TWLOHA teamed up with Boys Like Girls in creating and marketing these shirts to raise awareness. Even though Suicide Prevention week is long over, these shirts are still relevant.

http://bit.ly/c8SHPZ

TWLOHA FanCorps

2011-06-01T19:58:00.000-07:00

Two blogs in one day? NO WAY.

Anyway, you know how I always go through phases wanting to volunteer (well I always want to, but when I have more free time I'm always actively searching it out). Well, TWLOHA is one of my favorite organizations. I'm surprised I haven't posted about them before.

To Write Love On Her Arms is an organization that is dedicated to: "presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery."

Their vision (From their website):

You were created to love and be loved.  You were meant to live life in relationship with other people, to know and be known. You need to know that your story is important and that you're part of a bigger story.  You need to know that your life matters.
We live in a difficult world, a broken world.  My friend Byron is very smart - he says that life is hard for most people most of the time.  We believe that everyone can relate to pain, that all of us live with questions, and all of us get stuck in moments.  You need to know that you're not alone in the places you feel stuck.
We all wake to the human condition.  We wake to mystery and beauty but also to tragedy and loss.  Millions of people live with problems of pain.  Millions of homes are filled with questions – moments and seasons and cycles that come as thieves and aim to stay.  We know that pain is very real.  It is our privilege to suggest that hope is real, and that help is real.
You need to know that rescue is possible, that freedom is possible, that God is still in the business of redemption.  We're seeing it happen.  We're seeing lives change as people get the help they need.  People sitting across from a counselor for the first time.  People stepping into treatment.  In desperate moments, people calling a suicide hotline.  We know that the first step to recovery is the hardest to take.  We want to say here that it's worth it, that your life is worth fighting for, that it's possible to change.
Beyond treatment, we believe that community is essential, that people need other people, that we were never meant to do life alone.
The vision is that community and hope and help would replace secrets and silence.
The vision is people putting down guns and blades and bottles.
The vision is that we can reduce the suicide rate in America and around the world.
The vision is that we would learn what it means to love our friends, and that we would love ourselves enough to get the help we need.
The vision is better endings. The vision is the restoration of broken families and broken relationships.  The vision is people finding life, finding freedom, finding love. The vision is graduation, a Super Bowl, a wedding, a child, a sunrise. The vision is people becoming incredible parents, people breaking cycles, making change.
The vision is the possibility that your best days are ahead.
The vision is the possibility that we're more loved than we'll ever know.
The vision is hope, and hope is real.
You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story.

I have always wanted to get one of their shirts to support them and volunteer with them. Today I joined their street team and am volunteering online via FanCorps to raise awareness for their organization. Do you think it interests you?
Check it out: http://towriteloveonherarms.fancorps.com/headquarters/

Treasure Chest

2011-05-31T11:00:00.001-07:00

My friend's sister came up with this analogy when she was in high school and I think it's very warrior queen so I wanted to share it. It's my new philosophy that I've adopted. It encompasses all aspects of life in dealing with people and (sometimes) their toxicity.

Inside each and every one of us, there is a treasure chest of gems - rubies, diamonds, gold colins, emeralds, etc. And before we form a relationship with anybody, we must evaluate if their treasure will be as valuable as the treasure we are giving them. This is true in any relationship, whether it be friendship (what originally sparked this conversation), a relationship (which is what started the philosophy) or any sort of partnership.

Basically, is this person going to be as good to you and for you as you are to them. Too many times we form bonds and relationships with people who are just not a great match. We like to try to fix them, but no one can fix another person, they must fix themselves. You ca offer ideas and advice and support them, but why support something that is toxic and will only drain you? This becomes a parasitic relationship and you will resent that person.

Now the part that I was struggling with is that I have been feeling deceived. When these relationships of mine began they were anything but toxic. Our treasure was of equal value. But as time wore on, my treasure held its value (as it always does because I'm more focused on relationships than anything else) but theirs did not.

People change, circumstances change, events transpire...but it does not mean that the treasure I was originally given is cubic zirconia compared to my diamonds. It just means that that relationship has expired. It can be renewed in the future, perhaps if the value hasn't deteriorated completely.

It's like this:

Reflection on My Personal Slaveholders

2011-04-21T12:58:00.000-07:00

So, this week is Passover. No, I'm not Jewish; but I did go to my first Seder dinner on Monday. Here's the background: My aunt married a Jewish man when I was seven, thus making that part of my family Jewish. For years I've randomly taken part in Hannukahs and Shabbat dinners when I visit my aunt and uncle. Therefore, I am limitedly informed on Jewish practices, although more than the general Christian public. On Monday nights I have Media Law classes, but my teacher is Jewish so he canceled class this week. (Thus I was able to go to a Seder that my friend invited me to). My teacher put us to the test:

He told us the basis of Passover is the Exodus out of slavery for the Jews. At this time every year Jews will remember the event and thank God for it. Although a lot of the class is not Jewish, he asked us to reflect on three (or more) things in our lives that hold us in "slavery". What three things are we slaves to?

This, of course, is a very intriguing question that we should ask ourselves at any time. So, here are my top 3 things that I am a slave to.

1. Money. Oh boy, are we all slaves to money. Without it we can't do anything - not eat, sleep comfortably, get an education, hang out with friends, go to the bathroom (someone's gotta pay for the water!!) etc. I like to think that I generally shy away from the larger grasp of consumerism. I'm an educated consumer I suppose. I research the products I want to buy before I buy them and weigh the pros and cons of them. But it seems like I'm always losing money for some reason or another (not literally) in the form of bills, crises etc. And of course I'm constantly trying to MAKE money to be able to have a comfortable standard of living that I've sustained my whole life (As a child, thanks to my parents and family). Let's take what's going on right now for an example. I had a substantial amount of money in savings. Enough to be able to move out and into an apartment (so first and last month's rent + deposit and utilities) at the drop of a hat. But then I got sick for a few days and didn't work, right before taking a 10 day vacation out of state. So not only did I not work for 2 weeks, but I was continuing my normal spending patterns (if not slightly more since I was on vacation). I then return from vacation to pay my taxes. There goes another 400 dollars. So at this point I'm basically out around 800 dollars that I would have had. But it keeps on coming. My truck's decided now would be a good time to show that problem that wasn't such a pressing issue when the auto guy told me last year, but is now. So, who knows how much that's going to be. Oh, and guess what! I have to move out in 10 days. But, I'll figure out a place to go. Returning to the slaveholder at hand...I neeeeeed that money. So I'll work as hard and as often as I can, sacrificing my well-being and time with friends.

2. Society. Alright, so. I think that this pretty much encompasses all. How easy is it to be a complete individual in today's society? Probably the most difficult thing there is out there. We all have our ideas -- that have formed because of a reaction or as a result of something in SOCIETY. We dress a certain way, talk a certain way, are raised a certain way. In fact, this is basically the biggest slaveholder the world has. Society molds our brains before we can even walk. And there's no way to escape this slavery except to live on a commune (where that society will become new slaveholders) or to go live by yourself in Antartica where there's no population.

3. Ambition. I'm a slave to my ambition. It drives me to do so much, but sometimes I forget to do the fun things too. This one is probably the easiest for me to overcome, and that's why it's not the biggest thing that I'm a slave to. Also, I don't mind being a slave to my ambition and a workaholic most of the time. I've been working on finding a balance for quite some time, and I believe I'm succeeding.

What things in your life are you a slave to? :)

What type of education am i getting?

2011-04-21T12:28:00.000-07:00

Hello, I know it's been forever but things have been SO chaotic. Time permitting I have two blogs today though! Here's the first -- an editorial I wrote for my news blog for my journalism class. Enjoyyy!!

After attending Ohio State for two years and transferring into the California State University system, I'm a little lost in the shuffle. I thought that the state and country wanted me educated to get a job, but instead they're just holding me back.

Maybe I was naiive my senior year of high school about our education system, I was only a teen after all. I was under the impression that I was actually getting an education that would take me somewhere in life. I thought I was learning something, but apparently that's not really true.

California's school system is not very...effectual. Since the enactment of No Child Left Behind and the subsequent dumbing down of our standards, more children have been left behind. Instead of helping on the individual basis and solving the individual problems, we've lowered our standards.

I have always been an honors student; my curiosity for information is insatiable. This could explain how oblivious I was to the education system's flaws. With that curiosity I embarked to The Ohio State University with enough scholarships to pay in-state tuition.

OSU has an exquisite school system. With the most students attending one university in the nation, they have somehow figured out how to run smoothly.

Picture this scene:

Walking onto campus there is an overwhelming sea of red and a buzz of chatter as students show their school pride. Discussions of the game, the parties, class, organizations and events on campus are everywhere. The oval smells of fresh grass and students rush passed others leisurely enjoying the weather. Classes, scheduled with the help of advisors who somehow know each of their advisees personally, have prestigious teachers who are passionate about their subjects, jobs and students. OSU wants you to succeed.

But sometimes things happen and the students have to leave early, carrying with them a pride in a school that's known worldwide and worshipped throughout the state and its many alumni. Upon returning from OSU with an unfinished degree, I submerged myself into the California state school system.

I have never felt more cheated, under-appreciated or unprepared in my life.

America thrives on underdog stories and California definitely sets the scene for those with passion and drive to overcome all obstacles facing them. Those obstacles are staggering.

I'm convinced this school system only cares about my money, which they spend so frivolously that I never reap the benefits. To begin, the advisors neither know what's going on with student's classes and requirements (they solely know the credits they see in front of you), nor are they particularly interested in helping students graduate. Advisors in the CSU system are teachers who must advise, seemingly against their own will or interest.

After seeing several advisors who had no qualms with bringing me to frustrated tears, I've learned to be my own advisor, listening to the advice of students who have taken the classes that I need. It's more become a race of how soon can I graduate and receive passing grades, instead of my usual ardor for knowledge and drive for high grades.

To be frank, this system has made me resort to the popular DGAF attitude. This attitude can be seen around campus with a lack of school spirit and in the discussions of students hoping for nothing more than a C. Because we've been given information that is so much lower than what we are capable of understanding, we have fed into the system. By being treated like we are unintelligent, we have fulfilled that expectation by caring only enough to get a degree to get a job to make money and fulfill the mindless consumer slot America has opened for us. We are so much better than this. We can understand so much more. We can compete in the world market, if only we were given the opportunity and support.

Rant about Instant Gratification

2011-02-14T10:42:00.000-08:00

I know I've probably ranted about this before, but can we please talk about how annoying instant gratification thanks to cell phones and instant messaging is?

So, I'm taking a pop culture class and we did an example on cell phones and I just thought to myself, nah, I'm not one of those people who get's annoyed with cell phone's existence. I love my phone.

Okay but seriously, I hate the way that it makes you addicted.

Yes, I literally mean addicted. Not like, omg I'm addicted to this song. No. Actual addiction.

Ever feel like without your phone you're missing an important body part? Ever find yourself getting angry that someone texted you a minute ago and you replied immediately and they didn't reply again for 2 hours?!

Alright, I know I'm definitely guilty of this but I've been listening to it from friends for a few days and I want to like shoot something.

What'd you do after you texted me? drop your phone and hide from it for 2 hours?

No. Most likely, they were working, playing videogames or otherwise enjoying LIFE that's happening right in front of them.

For the most part I like to think I've gotten less dependent on my cell phone and better than I used to be. Everyone always says I'm attached to my cell phone. Yah, I get it. But you guys should have seen me when I first got texting and was dating Hunter.
Re. Dic. U. Lous.

But anyway, the instant gratification and communication thing especially bugs me in relationships. Like, "he didn't text me for a few hours so I decided he wasn't interested and deleted his number?!" poor guy, he was probably at work.

Let's face it, girls are the ones depending on their phones for him to text or call back.

Okayyy, We're not Gigi from He's Just Not That Into You.

Go lose your phone or something. That's what I do when I feel like this.

BUT I feel like it's creeping into other aspects of our lives. Like if a girl or a boy goes and talks to someone else at a party that you went to together and you don't see them for the majority of the night. People keep telling me they're ignored. Uh, go start a conversation yourself?

Idk, I'm really independent and I flit around at parties a lot. Or I sit in one place on the couch. Depends on my mood. But I'm not ignoring anyone, I'm just being weird.

Alright, /end rant

I need to go do some homework and get to work.

magazineee

2010-12-07T12:27:00.001-08:00

The magazine is in the process of being born. A very very veryyyy rough copy for a school project. Prepare to be amazed :)

Blurry Lines

2010-12-02T13:28:00.000-08:00

Ohhh, Friends with benefits...where is that line?

Where is the line where you're dating someone? Just fooling around? Just best friends who kiss and secretly crush on each other? How do you know if it's just a hookup?

Man oh man, I'm pretty sure I'm not the best person to answer this question because the blurry lines of relationships are something that I've seemed to have gotten lost on lately. But Erykka told me I should write about them. So here I am, with my first blog in over a month (I'm sorry my dear blog, I've just been so busy!!)

Remember when we were in high school and you knew you were boyfriend and girlfriend because someone asked if you wanted to go out with them, and by that standard you clearly were dating. Fuck, once I told a boy I didn't want a boyfriend but then I kissed him and that meant we were official (clearly...I still think it was a trick).

But now that I'm in college and much wiser beyond my years (or something cliche like that) I'm getting so lost with these relationship standards! So I decided to make a list of what I think it all means and to list some pros and cons for them?

Single: Well, I've figured this one out. I'm riding solo (riding solo, riding solo). I can run around going on dates and kissing whoever I want and no one can get hurt because of that (unless someone is delusional...but yeah). Pros: I CAN KISS WHOEVER I WANT. haha Cons: I probably shouldn't sleep with anyone, cause that's slut-like.

Friends with Benefits: Now this is nice. You can be single but still have ONE person you hook up with. I think it combined the pros and cons of being merely single. However, someone ALWAYS ends up wanting more ((I can't wait to see the new movie coming out on this))

Seeing someone: Going on dates, no strings, but you like them so you're most likely not making out with every man on the face of the earth (this is an assumption of course). Pros: you have someone Cons: the lines are blurryyy

It's Complicated: Boy, this just encompasses every confusing thing you've ever had in a relationship, including "i'm not dating my ex but I'm still in love with he/she and sleeping with he/she and we act like we're together but we have issues and are ignoring them instead of working through them" and "i like this guy but he has a kid with his ex girlfriend and they still live together and sleep in the same bed"

Exclusively dating: this one's kinda simple too. You're only with one person but you're not officially together and it's a little less pressure. Facebook doesn't know that you're in a relationship either. This is like the scaredy-cat's relationship. You're basically boyfriend and girlfriend without the labels. Usually someone gets annoyed with this. haha. I know I would be. I'd be like "hey loser, if you're not my boyfriend and you don't wanna see other people...wtf does that mean?"

In a relationship -- YAY! the Facebook world can now know. So bitches best not be all up in my man's business...also, who else thinks that this means you should only date one person?! Okay, good.

Marriage: Well if you're seeing other people you're really fucked up. haha. Legal, Social, and Religious implications.

Alright, so where do i fall on the spectrum? On the single, it's complicated end. But I'm it's complicated with myself. hahaha. As in, I confuse the crap out of myself. So, let's just say, I'm chillin. Seein what happens...not making out with every man on the planet...cause...you know...i could get an STD that way...but I'm not devoting my life to anyone other than me.

I'm enjoying this chilling bit though. And i might...maybe...probably have this whole crush deal going on ;)

Positive Magazines

2010-09-28T19:33:00.000-07:00

I'm curious.

What magazines did you read as a child? I'm talking before the formidable teenage years. I know I always loved to read that magazine that's at the doctor's offices with the fun games. I don't remember what it's called.

But I remember I was head over heels in love with American Girl magazine. Anything American Girl actually. I wanted the dolls (I got Josephina), I wanted all of the books (and I've got a bunch, including All About You, which teaches on puberty), and i religiously read the magazine. I briefly religiously read all other forms of teen magazines, but once you get out of the American Girl doll phase, it's really all downhill from there.

Take the next magazine I started reading, for example, J-14. It's supposed to target 14-year-olds. The only thing I remember from that magazine is that it had JTT on it and thus was good enough for me. But it was ALL about celebrity teens (seriously, Justin Bieber would be the king of this magazine). None of it was about me, as a teen.

It just got worse from there, though I never could have imagined it. Innocently, I read the next step of magazines. CosmoGirl! and Seventeen being the most prominent, of course. I dabbled in other teen magazines like GL and Teen Vogue. But the glossy pages of Seventeen and CosmoGirl! seemed to just pull you in with their alluring, "look pretty now" affordable fashion.

Somewhere around 16, I realized how much bullshit those magazines were, are. They cut you down and make you question every thing you do and I blame the tendency of my generation of girls to overanalyze ever minute detail of a relationship on them and popular tv shows that are marketed to the age.

Seriously, can we stop the exploitation?! Can we teach women that they should love their beautiful bodies and they just need to be themselves to be happy! The clothes, the tips, the guys in those magazines ARE NOT going to make us happy. Don't even get me started on Cosmopolitan. Let's just say very few boys actually agree with their "sex tips."

In my years wanting to start my own alternative magazine, I'm surprised I wasn't turned onto one that already existed until last year. Teen Voices is the redeeming teen magazine in the magazine world. Yet, I've NEVER ONCE seen it on a magazine stand. I only know of it from research for classes on the magazine industry.

The best part about Teen Voices, is it's written for teens, BY teens. Pretty freaking sweet if you ask me.

This magazine doesn't stop me from wanting to start my Warrior Queen magazine (which I should be getting a tattoo for within the next few days). It makes me want to start a MARKET for these magazines. I want my magazine to help pave the way for teen voices - because that's going to be the better magazine for teen girls to read. By the time my magazine makes it, I'm going to be just as removed from this lifestyle as the other editors are. But I'm going to hold onto the passion.

ah! I'm just so impassioned and excited right now. I'll post pix of my tattoo when I get it later this week!

WQ Empowerment

2010-09-25T14:12:00.000-07:00

Check out this article i had to read for my women and men in the media class. LET'S WQ IT UP!!!

New and exclusive: Enlightened Sexism excerpt, and an interview with author Susan Douglas | Bitch Magazine

new warrior queen playlist

2010-09-21T12:43:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile, just because I've been insanely busy with school and work. I haven't forgotten about my WQs or my magazine or any of my dreams though, don't worry!! I'll actually be starting freelancing for a magazine any day now!!

But anyway, I thought we were due for a new WQ playlist.
Here it is:

1. Strip Me - Natasha Bedingfield
2. Vanity - Christina Aguilera
3. Dynamite - Taio Cruz
4.Glitter in the Air - Pink
5. Bulletproof - La Roux
6. Rockstar - Rihanna
7. Soul Sister - Train
8. Where's the Fun - Rachel Kanner (my girl!!)
9. Real Girl - Danielle Robay (another of my girls!!)
10. I'm not your toy - La Roux
11. She is Love - Parachute
12. King of Anything - Sara Barielles

lemme know if there are any more you think i should add!!! Have a great Tuesdsay <3

Feministing - v. To be a feminist

2010-08-25T18:34:00.000-07:00

For the most part, and maybe I'm just lucky, but every class I've ever taken or encountered that studies women - be it psychology, media or something as simple as a self-help seminar - has never been anti-men.

Which is funny because feminists and women studies classes get a bad rapport for being "anti-men" thanks to a select few (like all journalists are liars and scum). So I get really excited whenever I take a women's studies like class, which is why I've decided to minor in it (i've taken 4 already, and 2 more this semester. I figured it can't hurt especially with where I want the magazine to go).

Yesterday I had Women and Men in the Media (seee, we love men!) In about half-hour I have feminist ethics. I'm intrigued. I have about a 2 hour break between classes today so I've been sitting in the library reading my WMM homework that's due at 930am tomorrow morning. I stumbled across a blog, and an excerpt of the writer's book and I'm practically running out the door to go buy it.

With that, here's the excerpt and a link and all of that good stuff. Remember -- FEEL GOOD about yourself =]

Excerpt

Copyright 2007 by Jessica Valenti from Full Frontal Feminism: A Young Woman's Guide to Why Feminism Matters. Reprinted by permission of Seal Press (www.sealpress.com), an imprint of Avalon Publishing Group, Inc. All rights reserved.

What's the worst possible thing you can call a woman? Don't hold back, now.

You're probably thinking of words like slut, whore, bitch, cunt (I told you not to hold back!), skank.

Okay, now what are the worst things you can call a guy? Fag, girl, bitch, pussy. I've even heard the term "mangina."

Notice anything? The worst thing you can call a guy is a girl. Being a woman is the ultimate insult. Now tell me that's not royally fucked up. Recognizing the screwed nature of this little exercise doesn't necessarily make you a feminist. But it should. Most young women know that something is off. And even if we know that some things are sexist, we're certainly not ready to say we're feminists. It's high time we get past the "I'm not a feminist, but ..." stuff. You know what I'm talking about: "I'm not a feminist or anything, but it is total bullshit that Wal-Mart won't fill my birth control prescription."

Do you think it's fair that a guy will make more money doing the same job as you? Does it piss you off and scare you when you find out about your friends getting raped? Do you ever feel like shit about your body? Do you ever feel like something is wrong with you because you don't fit into this bizarre ideal of what girls are supposed to be like?

Well, my friend, I hate to break it to you, but you're a hardcore feminist. I swear.

Feel-Good Feminism
For some reason, feminism is seen as super anti: anti-men, anti-sex, anti-sexism, anti-everything. And while some of those antis aren't bad things, it's not exactly exciting to get involved in something that's seen as so consistently negative.

The good news is, feminism isn't all about antis. It's progressive and -- as cheesy as this sounds -- it's about making your life better. As different as we all are, there's one thing most young women have in common: We're all brought up to feel like there's something wrong with us. We're too fat. We're dumb. We're too smart. We're not ladylike enough -- stop cursing, chewing with your mouth open, speaking your mind. We're too slutty. We're not slutty enough.

Fuck that.

You're not too fat. You're not too loud. You're not too smart. You're not unladylike.There is nothing wrong with you.

I know it sounds simple, but it took me a hell of a long time to understand this. And once I did, damn, did it feel good. Why go through your life believing you're not good enough and that you have to change?

Feminism not only allows you to see through the bullshit that would make you think there's something wrong with you, but also offers ways to make you feel good about yourself and to have self-respect without utilizing any mom-popular sayings, like "Keep your legs together," or boy-popular screamings, like "Show me your tits!"

Really, imagine how nice it would be to realize that all the stuff you've been taught that makes you feel crappy just isn't true. It's like self-help times one hundred.

But all that said, I really do understand the hesitancy surrounding the f-word. My own experience with the exercise that kicked off this chapter -- "What's the worst possible thing you can call a woman?" -- was presented by a professor on the first day of a women's literature class after she asked how many of us were feminists. Not one person raised a hand. Not even me. My excuse-ridden thinking was, "Oh, there's so many kinds of feminism, how can I say I know what they're all about? Blah, blah, blah, I'm a humanist, blah, blah, blah. Bullshit. When I think back on it, I knew I was a feminist. I was just too damn freaked out to be the only one raising her hand.

Most young women are feminists, but we're too afraid to say it -- or even to recognize it. And why not? Feminists are supposed to be ugly. And fat. And hairy! Is it fucked up that people are so concerned about dumb, superficial stuff like this? Of course. Is there anything wrong with being ugly, fat, or hairy? Of course not. But let's be honest: No one wants to be associated with something that is seen as uncool an unattractive. But the thing is, feminists are pretty cool (and attractive!) women.

So let's just get all the bullshit stereotypes and excuses out of the way.

But Feminists are Ugly!

Yawn. Honestly, this is the most tired stereotype ever. But it's supersmart in its own way. Think about it, ladies. What's the one thing that will undoubtedly make you feel like shit? Someone calling you ugly.

Back in fifth grade, the love of my life was Douglas MacIntyre, who told me I'd be pretty if only I didn't have such a big, ugly nose. I shit you not when I say that for months, every day after school I would stand in front of the three-way mirror in my bathroom, staring at the offending body part and trying to figure out how a nose could go so horribly, horribly wrong.

Ugly stays with you. It's powerful, and that's why the stereotype is so perfect. The easiest way to keep women -- especially young women -- away from feminism is to threaten them with the ugly stick. It's also the easiest way to dismiss someone and her opinoins. ("Oh, don't listen to her -- she's just pissed 'cause she's ugly.")

Seems stupid, right? I mean, really, what's with this na-na-na-boo-boo kind of argument? Have you ever heard of a Republican saying, "Oh, don't be a Democrat; they're all ugly"? Of course not, because that would be ridiculous. But for some reason, ridiculous is commonplace when it comes to the f-word.

For example, conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh says that feminism was established "to allow unattractive women easier access to the mainstream of society." Okay -- have you ever seen Rush Limbaugh? Yeah, enough said. Oh, and by the way -- I think I'm pretty hot now. So screw you, Douglas MacIntyre.

But Things Are Fine the Way They Are! What do I know? Maybe things are fine for you. Maybe you're lucky and superprivileged and you wake up in the morning to birds chirping and breakfast in bed and all that good stuff. But chances are, that's not the case.

There are plenty of folks who argue that feminism has achieved its goal. The 1998Time magazine article "Is Feminism Dead?" said, "If the women's movement were still useful, it would have something to say; it's dead because it has won."

There's no doubt that women have made progress, but just because we get to vote and have the "right" to work doesn't mean things are peachy keen. Anyone who thinks women have "won," that all is well and good now, should ask why the president of Harvard can say that maybe women are naturally worse at math and then have people actually take him seriously. Or why a teacher can still get fired for being pregnant and unmarried.

Seriously, are things really cool the way they are when so many of us are upchucking our meals and getting raped and beat up and being paid less money than men? And being denied birth control, and being told not to have sex but be sexy, and a hundred other things that make us feel shitty?

Methinks not. It can be better. It has to be.

http://www.alternet.org/story/50843?page=entire
http://feministing.com/
http://alternet.bookswelike.net/isbn/1580052010

Love Catch-22

2010-08-03T11:36:00.000-07:00

It seems that in this millenium we are stuck in a love catch-22. What do I mean?

I mean we often fall in love and find the person we want our happy ending with wayyy before we are ready for it. This makes sense though. Biologically, we are made to mate in our teens and twenties. That's when we're most fertile. However, we've been socialized to not worry or even think about mating until our thirties or later. It's okay to spend years in college and building a career and because of this we know more and we make more money. But our love and relationships suffer to an extent.

What happens when you fall in love at sixteen with a firey passion and that doesn't fade?

In centuries past you were encouraged to marry - whether it was a love match up or not. Today we're encouraged to have fun and not be tied down.

We've gone from relationships (leading to going steady to marriage) in the early to mid 1900s to "it's complicated."

And well, it's complicated is not always fun. An increasingly liberal society is putting us Gen Y-ers between a rock and a hard place.

On the one hand I've found myself in love but unsure how to fight through our tribulations. on the other side I'm 21 and I want to have fun. I want to go out and flirt and "live" - since that's what we call it. Anything other than having fun and partying must not be truly living.

Obviously,. I have some issues with this concept. But it's also something I'm living by. It's hard to escape socialization and society's pressures especially when it occasionally becomes very apparent that due to the society I grew up in, I am not ready for this large love that I have.

So I guess I'm stuck waiting.

Chegg is a money saver for suree

2010-07-25T12:57:00.000-07:00

I know for some of my friends "summer" is just beginning thanks to summer school finally being over, but I've been on summer break since May. It seems like school is fast approaching (again) and I'm super excited because that means I'm back at a university. WOO!! I've scheduled all of my classes and got my student loans. The next step? Parking pass and books...

I forgot that the one thing I hate about going to a university instead of a community college is how much the books cost / how many books are required of you. I have 5 classes, but only 4 are requesting books so far. Of those 4 classes I have a combined total of 11 books to buy / rent. If I bought them all...it'd cost about 460 dollars.

That's freaking ridiculous. I know I paid somewhere around that much my first semester at OSU but then I discovered some awesome ways to avoid that. Ohio's way was the best -- there was OhioLink, which basically rents out books from ANY of the universities in Ohio with that book, for FREEE.

Here in California, we aren't that thrifty, apparently. Thank goodness for Chegg though. I'd been hearing about Chegg for awhile but hadn't used it thanks to my fantastic time with OhioLink (which I discovered in my last quarter at OSU, damn). Once I started going to the community and they wanted still about 200 dollars for my textbooks I decided to try Chegg.

Last semester, I only rented one textbook because I bought all of the others for 5 or 10 bucks on craigslist (also a life saver, but it's very rare to find the books on there. I was lucky). Chegg offered great service - I got it quick and I didn't have to pay to ship it back, etc. They also donate trees for you, with your order. I think that's so nifty and cute.

So, I became obsessed with Chegg. I'm going to rent as many of those 11 books as I can on there as soon as I get the reimbursement from my student loan. (Hopefully, soon).

My obsession led me to want to "Promote Chegg." Which is pretty cool because it's free to sign up and you can give the people you promote to 5% off. Plus I get a kickback (somehow, i think it's $5 off of my orders per person...)

So here it is everyone. The code to use when renting books on Chegg (which will save you at least $500 a year -- Through renting on chegg i save 250 dollars this semester, actually)

I have a promo code that will save you an additional 5% off your total order, use: CC128312.

If you have any questions ask me!! =]

Have I told you about the book I'm writing?

2010-07-22T14:41:00.000-07:00

I say this often and the typical response is no. I'm not actually writing this book, though it'd probably be a best seller. But as the story goes...

The book's called Relationships: Don't Do Them.
Chapter 1: Don't do them
Chapter 2: If you find yourself in one get out immediately

At this point, everyone usually laughs. They know I'm not serious. It sounds so bitter, so scorned. But with the way things have been going lately, we all kinda agree.

I'm 21 and for the past few months I've been preaching being single. I don't want the drama of a relationship. I love, and I can't escape the drama; but still I try. Anyone who says relationships should be easy and drama free is delusional. There's always going to be disagreements and tough times. That's just how life is, in general.

I don't want that drama, but I crave the love. You see, it's hard when you've had it, when you have it but something happens so there is the drama.

In the words of Audrey Hepburn: "Your heart just breaks, that's all. But you can't judge, or point fingers. You just have to be lucky enough to find someone who appreciates you."

As I'm always saying, I love love. I need it to survive - we all do. So I'm always going to have hope. To want love. To want a relationship, despite the drama. The good outweighs it.

Teen Magazines Need a Makeover

2010-07-14T22:10:00.000-07:00

When I was a 14 and 15 I devoured as many as 10 teen magazines every month. Like most girls, I loved what I found between the glossy covers. The articles on style, hair and health drew me in but it was the articles about the crazy things that happen in girls lives and how they overcame obstacles.

CosmoGirl! was my favorite magazine for this. They always had CosmoGirl! of the year and featured strong women role models. Of the teen girl magazine CosmoGirl! has always been the one I’ve wanted to intern.

Once I realized my dream of wanting to have a teen girl’s magazine I only read the prominent magazines to get ideas – mostly of what not to include in my magazine. Eventually, I gave up on reading these magazines at all. They drive me up the wall with their pages of fashion and style and teaching girls that looking “pretty for back to school” is going to give that confidence every girl craves.

Sadly, it’s not true. Yes, a girl’s fashion gives her confidence. Yes, feeling pretty releases endorphins and boosts confidence levels. But who are these magazines to say that these main styles are the one that’s going to offer a girl the confidence she needs?

I look at the styles to look out for this for back to school: “sexy tomboy, glam rock, comfy girly, flirty sporty, artsy chic and sweetly chill.” Well, all of these styles are just a little too high maintenance for me. I like to get dressed up, and my makeup done and have a great night on the town. I like to look “sexy,” “hot, “gorgeous” or another synonym. But my general everyday school style would have been jeans and a tank top, the occasional dress or skirt; minimal makeup and my hair scrunched into waves.

This was my comfortable confidence. I ruled that school.

True, some days I wish I were more fashionable. Like on Friday when we had girls night and were supposed to go to a club. But for the most part I love my style. It makes me feel comfortable and for me comfort is confidence.

This month’s issue of Seventeen does have that one redeeming factor. Somewhere toward the back of the content between those glossy covers is a promotion from Above the Influence and Seventeen that touches on confidence. “The confidence quiz” coupled with a mission statement is a very healthy start toward realizing the confidence that should come easily for any girl.

But those two pages could be easily skipped over as their scrunched between this latest style and that latest style. We all love to read about styles and want to look good. But shouldn’t a teen magazine be filled with more positive things and touch on the more shallow things briefly.

I’m not saying Seventeen is a bad magazine for girls to look up to. We have several magazines that touch on everything, but how many widespread magazines focus positively on teen girls? Not many. Like I mentioned, CosmoGirl! appears to be the closest to what I aspire for.

I will have it. People tell me that I should keep my idea to myself, so that no one steals it. But someone can take my idea without forming it the way I want it to. Who am I to care if someone else takes my idea, as long as there is someone out there being helped by it.

I believe it’s my purpose here – to help people in any way that I can. To have this magazine, I don’t believe anyone could take that from me. It is me. I live and breathe it, and no one could make anything as I could. We are all different, yet so the same.

Someone someday may make my magazine, they may make it better or they may make it worse. Either way, I will get that magazine out there. If I can’t be the person behind the idea, although I don’t see how I wouldn’t be, then at least I will work on that magazine to help mold it as I can.

A magazine is a whole bunch of parts, a bunch of people with different ideas. Will it matter if I’m the head or the one with the idea? Not at all. I want to edit because I enjoy it, but I would be just as content writing.

As always, my blog has gone on a tangent, but I like this one so I’ll keep it. I showed my confidence, where’s yours?

21: Fine, Fresh, Fierce - I've got it on lock

2010-07-14T19:20:00.000-07:00

I know it's been forever since I've written. But I've been planning this one out since my birthday. I've just been too busy, but now that I'm in the process of moving and I'm done at bdubs =[ I have more time to write. So here it is - my 21 blog =]

Last year, around my 20^th birthday I had what I refer to as a midlife crisis, though I certainly hope that was not midway through my life. I know I wrote about it. I wrote about how I wanted it to be 5 years into the future; I wanted to be married with children. My thought process was that I wanted my life to be stable, after a few years of total instability that threw me into this chaotic life crisis.

Since then, I worked daily to make things better – some of which I wrote about as well. I went to the psychologist to get my anxiety under control, switched my birth control to cut out emotional side effects and generally worked toward making every day happier and better. I’ve sort of adopted a policy of DGAF, which, in layman’s terms means “don’t give a fuck.”

It’s funny; the girl who cares too much is now caring so little. It’s not that I care so little about the things that are important to me, but I’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t need to stress about it.

When 2010 began I said to myself, 2010 is going to rival 2007, I can feel it. Overall, halfway through the year, I believe I was right.

2007 was senior year – I had all of my senior fun things, the newspaper was taking off, and I was moving to Ohio. I loved my first semester at Ohio State. 2010 I have so many fun things that come with turning 21 and just being more carefree in general. I’ve had my struggles – car issues, dealing with things with my dad, etc. – but I’m not stressing about them as much. My anxiety is continuing to fade. I work so hard at my magazine, and while I’m not getting paid yet, I’m okay with that. I am moving to Moorpark to go to Cal State Northridge in a week.

My one worry, and it’s a big one, is that it’s all going to end up like it did when I went to Ohio, overall. So many things have changed though, and this is just an anxiety about having anxiety. OCD. Not being in control. I know it all. So I push it aside. Not because I don’t want to deal with it, but because I know that it’s not something to stress out. I will take that obstacle when it comes.

I know I’ve been spouting out euphemisms like this for forever, but I actually feel different this time.

Clearly, it’s been building for a while. On my 21^st birthday two things really irked me, but for the weeks leading up I decided I wasn’t going to let anything drag down my birthday. I was going to make it epic and I was going to love every second of it. I did, even the puking and feeling like death. I’d never before let myself lose that control.

It’s not a feeling I want to feel often, although I do admit I drink a lot more than I did before. But I always do it in moderation. Since I’ve developed my DGAF I’m out having more fun (because I’m not inside worrying) and I’m less stressed about my relationships with people. If people want to be my friend or talk to me or have something to say to me they will.

It’s really nice; I finally understand what it’s like to not care about every little thing being perfect. I suppose this is me not being as OCD as I can be. It’s me attempting to be more normal.

Since I’ve turned 21, I don’t want to rush that 25 years old or that married with kids. I’m content and ecstatic with my life. I’m single and I’m having fun with the experiences that I’m having. When I move there may be an opportunity to change that. I’ve been thinking about it for a while – I’ve been hoping for this moment as a make it or break it point. Which I know, it’s not. Life is a series of moments, a series of make it or break it points. “Day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.”

I don’t know what I’m going to do when I move. But I’m very into seeing what happens, day by day. This is exciting. =]